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Many economically developed countries give economic support to poorer regions, although there may be benefits, some critics say that this policy does more harm than good. Discuss both side of arguments. v.1

Many economically developed countries give economic support to poorer regions, although there may be benefits, some critics say that this policy does more harm than good. v. 1
It is undeniable that after third world war, most of the developed nations like US, UK and Russia have been playing an essential role in fostering the economic growth of under developed nations. However, a considerable amount of people opines that this approach has a detrimental effect. In this essay i will examine both viewpoints in the following essay before forming any establishment. First and foremost, there are several advantages of foreign treatment. Firstly, it helps in providing educational & employment opportunities to most of masses by setting up education institutes and Industries. Secondly, It would make them independent county as any service from strong country would strengthen their economy. Finally, Developed nations send expert doctors to underdeveloped to teach and guide regards to health practice. In other words, improved health practice results in less disease. For instance, Based on the recent WHO survey in 2001, countries like Peru and Maldives have started practicing a quality heath practice which has led to decrease in contagious disease from 85% to 44%. On a contrary, Foreign care has a several positive impacts, but does come with some consequences. Any monetary support would force other officials of corruption, in other words, minimal amount would be used to right purpose and remaining would go their pockets. Favouring selected countries over others would cause a conflict. Lastly, financial compensation would leave poor countries with deeper debt. Therefore, proper surveillance should be measured before any actions. In a nutshell, Giving financial and other forms of subsidy is a humanitarian act and has several benefits. However, critics are also correct in their own way. Therefore, the best way to address them is to coe up with a structural design and utmost focus on corruption
It is undeniable that after third world war, most of the developed nations like US, UK and Russia have been playing an essential role in fostering the economic growth of under developed nations.
However
, a considerable amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
opines that this approach has a detrimental effect. In this essay
Did you mean "I"?
i
will examine both viewpoints in the following essay
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
forming any establishment.

First
and foremost, there are several advantages of foreign treatment.
Firstly
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in providing educational & employment opportunities to
After 'most of', you should use 'the' ("most of the masses") or simply say "most masses".
most of masses
by setting up education institutes and Industries.
Secondly
, It would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them independent county as any service from strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
would strengthen their economy.
Finally
, Developed nations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
expert doctors
Did you mean "too underdeveloped to"?
to underdeveloped to
teach and guide regards to health practice. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
health practice results in less disease.
For instance
, Based on the recent WHO survey in 2001,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Peru and Maldives have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
practicing a quality heath practice which has led to decrease in contagious disease from 85% to 44%.

On a contrary, Foreign care has a several
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impacts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
does
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consequences. Any monetary support would force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
officials of corruption, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, minimal amount would be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to right purpose and remaining would go their pockets.
Possible spelling mistake. 'Favouring' is British English.
Favouring
selected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
over others would cause a conflict.
Lastly
, financial compensation would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
with deeper debt.
Therefore
, proper surveillance should
be measured
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
any actions.

In a nutshell, Giving financial and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
forms of subsidy is a humanitarian act and has several benefits.
However
, critics are
also
correct in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way.
Therefore
, the best way to address them is to
Possible spelling mistake found.
coe
up with a structural design and utmost focus on corruption
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Many economically developed countries give economic support to poorer regions, although there may be benefits, some critics say that this policy does more harm than good. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
286 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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