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Many companies and organisations require their employees to wear uniform What kind of jobs require uniforms What are the disadvantages of wearing uniform to work v.1

Many companies and organisations require their employees to wear uniform What kind of jobs require uniforms What are the disadvantages of wearing uniform to work v. 1
Few person trust that robots are the essential for a human being to give the better forthcoming, whereas others believe that it is hazardous discovery which can affect people in a negative form. There is necessary to understand both the thoughts and one opinion should be given on that. Discussing about the first opinion that, in 21st century science has grown so advanced that it has made life more easy than previous timing. Now a day, robotic techniques became so famous that it is really helpful at medical range. In some countries, robots are operating the surgeries of humans and they are becoming the life saviours, which is a major significant. Not only in the medical field, but in the engineering too, robotic engineering is advantageous. Robots are a kind of automatic machines which is acting as computer and it has no limit in work. By the means of electricity, robots are working. These all advantages are beneficial for the future and it will affect the human's prospective in a good form. Another scenario tells that robotic discovery impacts the humans negatively. Due to the replacement of humans with robots in a work field, unemployment is increased. By this, people are being jobless. Further more, financial crisis plays a role, not all the companies can afford the robotic technology. Due to mentioned technology, people are doing less work, because of that, various diseases are being developed like obesity, heart problems, psychological problems etc. Gaming sectors have also a robotic technology, which somehow leads to drawbacks in adults and teenage peoples. In conclusion, I would give my opinion towards the advantages of robot which is a part of prospective developers. There are some disadvantages too, but by means of struggles, problems can be solved. Here, advantages of robotic discovery outweighs the disadvantages.
Few person trust that robots are the essential for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
being to give the better forthcoming, whereas others believe that it is hazardous discovery which can affect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
form. There is necessary to understand both the thoughts and one opinion should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
on that.

Did you mean simply "Discussing the"? You do not need the word "about" here.
Discussing about the
first
opinion that, in 21st century science has grown
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
advanced that it has made life more easy than previous timing.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
a day,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
techniques became
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
that it is
really
helpful at medical range. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries, robots are operating the surgeries of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
humans and
they are becoming the life
Possible spelling mistake found.
saviours
, which is a major significant. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
in the medical field,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in the engineering too,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
engineering is advantageous. Robots are a kind of automatic machines which is acting as computer and it has no limit in work. By the means of electricity, robots are working. These all advantages are beneficial for the future and it will affect the human's prospective in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
form.

Another scenario
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
discovery impacts the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
negatively
. Due to the replacement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
with robots in a work field, unemployment
is increased
. By this,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are being jobless.
Further
more, financial crisis plays a role, not all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
can afford the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
technology. Due to mentioned technology,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are doing less work,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that, various diseases are
being developed
like obesity, heart problems, psychological problems etc. Gaming sectors have
also
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
technology, which somehow leads to drawbacks in adults and teenage peoples.

In conclusion
, I would give my opinion towards the advantages of robot which is a part of prospective developers. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages too,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by means of struggles, problems can
be solved
. Here, advantages of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
robotic
discovery outweighs the disadvantages.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The joy of knowing a foreign language is inexpressible. I find it really difficult to express such joy in my mother tongue.
Munia Khan

IELTS essay Many companies and organisations require their employees to wear uniform What kind of jobs require uniforms What are the disadvantages of wearing uniform to work v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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