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Many animals are being hunted to the brink of extinction in order to fulfill the demand and greed of mankind for decorative purposes as well as for other reasons, such as tranditional medicine how could this be solved? v.1

People hunt animals to satisfy their greed and sometimes or medicinal purposes as well. For example, tigers and crocodiles are being hunted for their skin. Likewise, elephants are being killed because their tusks have great ornamental value. Some forms of medicine also use products obtained from animals. Unfortunately, excessive hunting and poaching has led to the extinction of many species. Many more are on the verge of extinction. When animals become extinct the impact on the food chain is enormous. Before long, it will affect the balance of our ecosystem. Since humans cannot survive without other members of the food chain, it is imperative that we put a stop to mindless poaching and hunting. Enacting stringent laws that make poaching a serious crime is definitely a step in the right direction. The government must also create awareness about the need to protect wild animals. It must bring home the fact that if animals die people will not be able to survive. The school curriculum should incorporate lessons that teach children the importance of protecting animals. In addition, the government should build wildlife sanctuaries where animals can live and breed without facing any threat from poachers. The biggest argument in favour of hunting is that animals have medicinal value. Some alternative forms of medicine use products obtained from some wild animals. While it is true that these medicines have healing properties, that is not a reason to permit hunting. What’s more, modern medicine is evolving at a rapid pace and already most illnesses have cures that do not use any animal products. While banning traditional medicine is not a viable option, the government must enact laws that prohibit the use of endangered animals for making medicines. To conclude, stringent laws are needed to protect animals from poaching. Poachers must be given harsh punishments. At the same time, the government must launch awareness campaigns about the need to protect animal

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
People
 hunt You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 to satisfy their greed and This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :in some instances
sometimes
 or medicinal purposes as well
. For example
, tigers and crocodiles are being hunted
 for their skin. Likewise
, elephants are being killed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:due to the factin light of the fact thatowing to the fact that
because
 their tusks have great ornamental value. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
Some
 forms of You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpharmaceuticalmedicationantibioticdrugremedycure
medicine
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 products obtained from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
. Unfortunately, excessive hunting and You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsmuggle
poaching
 has led to the extinction of This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
many
 species. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a plethora ofa number ofnumerous
Many
 more are on the verge of extinction.

“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 become extinct the impact on the food chain is enormous. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
Before
 long, it will affect the balance of our ecosystem. Since humans cannot survive without other members of the food chain, it is imperative that we put a This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :terminateceasediscontinue
stop
 to mindless You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsmuggle
poaching
 and hunting.

Enacting stringent laws that This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :createconstructmanufactureproduce
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsmuggle
poaching
 a serious crime is definitely a step in the right direction. The You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpowerministryunionauthoritystaterule
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
also
 create awareness about the need to protect wild You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
. It This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
 bring home the fact that if You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :pass away
die
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :individualsnationsociety
people
 will not be able to survive. The school curriculum should incorporate lessons that teach children the importance of protecting You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
. In addition
, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpowerministryunionauthoritystaterule
government
 should build wildlife sanctuaries where You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 can This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :reside
live
 and breed without facing any threat from poachers.

The biggest argument in Possible spelling mistake. ‘favour’ is British English.favor
favour
 of hunting is that You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 have medicinal value. This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
Some
 alternative forms of You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpharmaceuticalmedicationantibioticdrugremedycure
medicine
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 products obtained from This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:a number of
some
 wild You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
. While it is true that these medicines have healing properties, that is
 not a reason to permit hunting. What’s more, modern You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpharmaceuticalmedicationantibioticdrugremedycure
medicine
 is evolving at a rapid pace and already most illnesses have cures that do not This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 any You use this word too often, consider replacing it withnaturalbodily
animal
 products. While banning traditional You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpharmaceuticalmedicationantibioticdrugremedycure
medicine
 is not a viable option, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpowerministryunionauthoritystaterule
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
 enact laws that prohibit the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :exploit
use
 of endangered You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 for making medicines.

To conclude
, stringent laws are needed
 to protect You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpetbeastcreature
animals
 from You use this word too often, consider replacing it withsmuggle
poaching
. Poachers This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
 be This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :accorded
given
 harsh punishments. At the same time, the You use this word too often, consider replacing it withpowerministryunionauthoritystaterule
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :require
must
 launch awareness campaigns about the need to protect Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph.animal.animal!animal?animal:animal,animal;
animal