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Living in large cities today poses many problems for people. What are these problems? Should governments encourage more people to live in smaller towns? v.3

Living in large cities today poses many problems for people. What are these problems? Should governments encourage more people to live in smaller towns? v. 3
Large cities indeed cause numerous difficulties for residents. While several problems can be recognized, I agree with the viewpoint that the states can tackle these problems by shifting the population to other towns. If a big city occupies with overloaded population, it will lead to various challenges for the people and society, because of the following reasons. Firstly, a great number of people who live in a big city always cause air pollution, since they regularly prefer to use personal cars. Consequently, this issue would jeopardize the residents’ health. Secondly, governments would have severe dilemmas to provide facilities for these intensive population. Finally, it has been proved that in large cities people usually reside with distinct cultures and religions, and this fact would create conflicts among the citizens of a large city. The beliefs can be different between cultures; for instance, while something is not problematic in one society, it would be annoying and offensive to another one. However, governments can encourage people to resettle in small towns instead of crowded capitals. States should allocate proper funds for the reconstruction of small towns. They also have to provide recreation facilities to attract families to other lands of the country. It would be beneficial for people and state if the population distributed properly across the county. Therefore, states are the main regulator of this issue, and residents of large cities will cooperate with the government when they perceive that can opt for another option with better concessions. In conclusion, living in a crowded city, like capitals, would be annoying for not only citizens but also the government, and states can tackle the problem with providing facilities in small towns.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
indeed
cause numerous difficulties for residents. While several problems can
be recognized
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the viewpoint that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
states
can tackle these problems by shifting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
to other towns.

If a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city occupies with overloaded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
, it will lead to various challenges for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and society,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the following reasons.
Firstly
, a great number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
city always cause air pollution, since they
regularly
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
personal cars.
Consequently
, this issue would jeopardize the residents’ health.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
would have severe dilemmas to provide facilities for these intensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
.
Finally
, it has
been proved
that in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
usually
reside with distinct cultures and religions, and this fact would create conflicts among the citizens of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
city. The beliefs can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
between cultures;
for instance
, while something is not problematic in one society, it would be annoying and offensive to another one.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
can encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to resettle in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
towns
instead
of crowded capitals.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
should allocate proper funds for the reconstruction of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
towns. They
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
provide recreation facilities to attract families to other lands of the country. It would be beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state
if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
distributed
properly
across the county.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
states
are the main regulator of this issue, and residents of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
will cooperate with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
when they perceive that can opt for another option with better concessions.

In conclusion
, living in a crowded city, like capitals, would be annoying for not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
states
can tackle the problem with providing facilities in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
towns.
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
25Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Living in large cities today poses many problems for people. What are these problems? Should governments encourage more people to live in smaller towns? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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