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People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns? v.2

People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns? v. 2
Currently, urban dwellers need to deal with numerous issues. From my perspective, these problems are mostly manifested in housing and traffic aspects, governments should use counter-urbanization as a measure to ease the mentioned problems. Living in large cities, people are faced with housing and traffic problems daily. To start with, the incessant flow of migrants to metropolises has made the demand far exceed the supply, leading to a negative increase in property prices and a severe lack of accommodation. It has also caused the formation of slums for homeless people, bringing insecurity and diseases. Another existing issue prevalent among large cities is the failure to accommodate an ever-increasing volume of traffic. This is compounded by the fact that a majority of people prefer privately owning vehicles because they are more comfortable and flexible for doing multiple tasks than public transit. It results in endless daily gridlock, a scene usually witnessed on Los Angeles streets at 5 PM. To tackle both these issues, governments should promote the migration from urban areas to rural ones to not only reduce the problems in big cities but also provides the citizens with higher job opportunities. The lower population density, the lower similarly commuting demand and accommodation burden. Additionally, it is undeniable that many small towns are underdeveloped due to labour scarcity. Therefore, more people move to these towns could balance the employment rate and contribute to the development of the regional economy. For example, Australia has succeeded in a redistribution program to reduce congestion and pollution problems. This program gave chances for companies to set up in country towns and created many employment possibilities for its citizens. In conclusion, people living in large cities could confront troubles with traffic, accommodation and some associated issues. Thus, governments should support the movement of people to smaller towns or rural areas.
Currently
, urban dwellers need to deal with numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
. From my perspective, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
mostly
manifested in housing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
aspects,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
counter-urbanization as a measure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
the mentioned problems.

Living in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are faced
with housing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
daily. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with, the incessant flow of migrants to metropolises has made the demand far exceed the supply, leading to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
increase in property prices and a severe lack of accommodation. It has
also
caused the formation of slums for homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, bringing insecurity and diseases. Another existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
prevalent among large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
is the failure to accommodate an ever-increasing volume of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
. This
is compounded
by the fact that a majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer
privately
owning vehicles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are more comfortable and flexible for doing multiple tasks than public transit. It results in endless daily gridlock, a scene
usually
witnessed on Los Angeles streets at 5 PM.

To tackle both these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should promote the migration from urban areas to rural ones to not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
provides the citizens with higher job opportunities. The lower population density, the lower
similarly
commuting demand and accommodation burden.
Additionally
, it is undeniable that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
are underdeveloped
due to
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
scarcity.
Therefore
, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
could balance the employment rate and contribute to the development of the regional economy.
For example
, Australia has succeeded in a redistribution program to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
congestion and pollution
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. This program gave chances for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
to set up in country
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
and created
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
employment possibilities for its citizens.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
could confront troubles with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
, accommodation and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
associated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
.
Thus
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should support the movement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
towns
or rural areas.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay People living in large cities today face many problems in their everyday life. What are these problems? Should governments encourage people to move to smaller regional towns? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
304 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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