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It is thought by some that its is better to live in a city while others believe that life is better in the countryside. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.2

It is thought by some that its is better to live in a city while others believe that life is better in the countryside. v. 2
It is often believed that it is better to reside in a metropolis, however, other people prefer to live in the rural areas. The reason of this is convenient for the former and lesser pollution for the latter. My own viewpoint will also be stated. To begin with, deciding to live in a city could be promising as easier access to numerous establishments is one great advantage. The availability of various products and daily needs in a single shopping mall give many people much-coveted comfort and experience. They can readily buy commodities and other luxurious items in only few minutes away from their home. Apart from this, it is for a fact that there would be more opportunities for work in the city centre. Large corporations are located in this area and could offer tremendous jobs to locals. On the other hand, a healthier environment is what people sought after in staying in the countryside. Most vehicles and industrial plant are fewer in this area, thereby inducing little or almost no pollution at all. A green and clean environment can also offer them a peaceful and calming feeling that are of prime considerations on their part. For example, some old folks are generally in favour of the rural setting as it gives them plain and tranquil lives. To sum up, the issue of either living in the urban or in the outskirts of the city is dependent on the factor to consider and preferences of people who would choose to live there. In my perspective, I would prefer to reside in the metropolitan area as it will be more convenient for me to access into various shops, transportation and jobs.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
believed that it is better to reside in a metropolis,
however
, other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in the rural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
. The reason of this is convenient for the former and lesser pollution for the latter. My
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
viewpoint will
also
be stated
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, deciding to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a city could be promising as easier access to numerous establishments is one great advantage. The availability of various products and daily needs in a single shopping mall give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
much-coveted comfort and experience. They can
readily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
commodities and other luxurious items in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
few minutes away from their home. Apart from this, it is for a fact that there would be more opportunities for work in the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
. Large corporations
are located
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
and could offer tremendous jobs to locals.

On the other hand
, a healthier environment is what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
sought after in staying in the countryside. Most vehicles and industrial plant are fewer in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
, thereby inducing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
or almost no pollution at all. A green and clean environment can
also
offer them a peaceful and calming feeling that are of prime considerations on their part.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
folks are
generally
in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of the rural setting as it gives them plain and tranquil
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

To sum up, the issue of either living in the urban or in the outskirts of the city is dependent on the factor to consider and preferences of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who would choose to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
there. In my perspective, I would prefer to reside in the metropolitan
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
as it will be more convenient for me to access into various shops, transportation and jobs.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
It is astonishing how much enjoyment one can get out of a language that one understands imperfectly.
Basil Lanneau Gildersleeve

IELTS essay It is thought by some that its is better to live in a city while others believe that life is better in the countryside. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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