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It is observed that in many countries not enough students are choosing to study science subject. What are causes? And what will be effects on society? v.6

Of late, science has been a prevailing concern in significant part of our country. While studying at University, collegues adopt interested subject, whereas, they found science less imperative. In the following, paragraphs would elucidate a possible reasons for a problem and propose a few consequence on a community. To commence with the main purpose, is that a subject is distinct into several categories such as social science, computer science as well as chemistry and many more which do not have any career path. However they often focus on their future jobs which provide a better financial resources. Take doctor as an example. Moreover, biology's student selected this as it is having great demand, nevertheless, a large proportion of money is required to set up a high quality of satisfaction of job. Therefore, rest of a persons ignore these part of education. Undoubtedly, every issue has some impact on the society. The great influence is on the job because less people will apply for it. Even if, anyone joins a job, no new methods will emerge among them. Moreover the seats of employees would be vacant and old emplyees will not promoted to the higher level. In conclusion, it is witnessed that every outcome has its own disadvantages and advantages towards a commodity.
Of late,
science
has been a prevailing concern in significant part of our country. While studying at University, collegues adopt interested subject, whereas, they found
science
less imperative. In the following, paragraphs would elucidate a possible reasons for a problem and propose a few consequence on a community.

To commence with the main purpose, is that a subject is distinct into several categories such as social
science
, computer
science
as well
as chemistry and
many
more which do not have any career path.
However
they
often
focus on their future
jobs
which provide a better financial resources. Take doctor as an example.
Moreover
, biology's student selected this as it is having great demand,
nevertheless
, a large proportion of money
is required
to set up a high quality of satisfaction of
job
.
Therefore
, rest of a persons
ignore
these part of education.

Undoubtedly
, every issue has
some
impact on the society. The great influence is on the
job
because
less
people
will apply for it. Even if, anyone
joins
a
job
, no new methods will emerge among them.
Moreover
the seats of employees would be vacant and
old
emplyees will not promoted to the higher level.

In conclusion
, it
is witnessed
that every outcome has its
own
disadvantages and advantages towards a commodity.
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IELTS essay It has been observed that in my country's not enough students are choosing to study science subject at University. What do you think are the causes of problem? What are the effects on society?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
212 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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