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It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v.16

It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v. 16
Children are at such age of their life when they barely know between the right and the wrong. It is very necessary for parents and teachers to teach them, first, by suggestion followed by punishment if they manage to do the same mistake. This essay agrees that it is acceptable to give child punishment so they know the difference between good and bad. Firstly, this essay will discuss the fact that punishment teaches children to be responsible and secondly, discuss punishment doesn’t always have to be physical. Punishment teaches children self-discipline. The goal of punishment or discipline is to help your kid learn to be responsible and learn how to make choices. Letting adolescence experience the consequences of his choices lets him learn how to be accountable for his actions. A child learns over time to look inside to make a choice rather to what they will get from outside themselves. For instance, in the Islamic religion, parents are required to order their children to pray when they are seven years old and beat them (if they still don't pray) when they are ten years old. That was solely for their child good and for the child to get used to. Despite the need for punishment to teach a child punishments should always be associated with some lessons for children. Punishment must be fruitful and it must not be physically or mentally harmful. For example, Schools in Japan asks children to plant trees as a punishment. An elementary school in America punishes children by asking them to join a yoga class. Such punishments are constructive for children's health and society as well. To conclude, punishment is necessary to teach children morality and help them learn to distinguish good things from bad ones. However, this punishment should not be physical but psychological and practical.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
are at such age of their life when they
barely
know between the right and the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
necessary for parents and teachers to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
them,
first
, by suggestion followed by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
if they manage to do the same mistake. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agrees
that it is acceptable to give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they know the difference between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
.
Firstly
, this essay will discuss the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be responsible and
secondly
, discuss
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
doesn’t always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be physical.

Punishment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teaches
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
self-discipline. The goal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
or discipline is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
your kid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
to be responsible and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
choices. Letting adolescence experience the consequences of his choices
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lets
him
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
how to be accountable for his actions. A
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learns
over time to look inside to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a choice
rather
to what they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
from outside themselves.
For instance
, in the Islamic religion, parents
are required
to order their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to pray when they are seven years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and beat them (if they
still
don't pray) when they are ten years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
. That was
solely
for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to.

Despite the need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
should always
be associated
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
lessons for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Punishment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be fruitful and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not be
physically
or mentally harmful.
For example
, Schools in Japan asks
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to plant trees as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
. An elementary school in America punishes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by asking them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
a yoga
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishments
are constructive for children's health and society
as well
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
is necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
morality and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
to distinguish
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
things from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
ones.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
punishment
should not be physical
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
psychological and practical.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
35Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay It is important for children to learn the difference between right and wrong at an early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. with this opinion? What sort of punishment should parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? v. 16

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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