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It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reason why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience. v.3

It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reason why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience. v. 3
In this contemporary world, family bond among family members has been changed when compared to the past. Mainly, this has happened due to the complex life style that we have currently. However, this trend can be changed in a positive manner with the help of few commitments. With our busy life, the bond that we had with the family has become so weak. In the past, most of families used to have their own family space to discuss their family matters. However, with the complex life style this trend now has changed. For example, most families use to gather themselves in the dinner time and they use to have their own family chat within that moment. However, with the busy schedules now they have and they use to work beyond the normed working hours which can be lead to missing the dinner time with their families. Clearly, this can create huge impact on a child's life and be lead to create a gap between their parents. Even though, with the help of minor adjustments this trend can be changed. Parents can have a day off from their workstations and use that time to spend with their kids together. For instance, most of people apply for annual leave plan on their kids' summer vacation and travel somewhere with their families. In short, family reunion time can be used effectively and will be able to make stronger the family bond. Is the present family bond stronger when compared to the past? When compared to the past this trend is decreasing and with a few commitments, such as family outings that can be increased eliminate the most of the issues that they facing with their youngsters.
In this contemporary world,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bond among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
when compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
.
Mainly
, this has happened due to the complex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style that we have
currently
.
However
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
manner with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of few commitments.

With our busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, the bond that we had with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
weak. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
space to discuss their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
matters.
However
, with the complex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.
For example
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to gather themselves in the dinner
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
time and
they
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
chat within that moment.
However
, with the busy schedules
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
have and
they
Make sure that 'use to' is correct. For habitual actions in the past or to mean 'accustomed to', use "used to".
use to
work beyond the
Possible spelling mistake found.
normed
working hours which can be lead to missing the dinner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
.
Clearly
, this can create huge impact on a child's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and be lead to create a gap between their parents.

Even though
, with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of minor adjustments this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. Parents can have a day off from their workstations and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to spend with their kids together.
For instance
, most of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
apply for annual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
plan on their kids' summer vacation and travel somewhere with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
. In short,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
reunion
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
effectively
and will be able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
stronger the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bond.

Is the present
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
bond stronger when compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
? When compared to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
past
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trend
is decreasing and with a few commitments, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
outings that can
be increased
eliminate the most of the issues that
Did you mean "they're facing", "they are facing", or "they were facing"?
they facing
with their youngsters.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay It is generally accepted that families are not as close as they used to be. Give some reason why this change has happened and suggest how families could be brought closer together. Include any relevant examples from your experience. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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