Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media rich society. v.3

It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media rich society. v. 3
Usages and influence of media in our life and society have dramatically increased around the globe over the last few years. It has become a mandatory part of people’s lives as media are everywhere. Youngsters are mostly influenced by media because of its numerous benefits. People of other age groups are also influenced by the media. They are using this in the form of newspapers, television, radio and internet to avail maximum advantages such as information dissemination, entertainment and latest updates of various promotions etc. However, the increasing use of media has some detrimental effects on the society. There is no doubt that media play a pivotal role in learning. A large number of people are using electronic media to complete their education assignment and projects, for instance, YouTube has a large volume of lectures in the form of videos to assist thousands of viewers. Moreover, media has a diversity of programs to entertain its target audience. It also helps them to increase their knowledge about current issues worldwide. Media often increase our awareness and inform about things that are happening around us. Thus it is a great tool to bring people together. However, media has also increased people’s woes. In order to increase rating, they are more opted to portray negative news and bad aspects of society that made people tense and increased their worries. Furthermore, people are less perceptive to physical activities because they do not want to skip their favourite television show and thus they become lethargic that makes them susceptible to illness such as laziness, obesity and anxiety. Political biasness, monetary gaining and vengeance are often practices in some media and that has very detrimental effects on our society. To sum up, I would like to say media has more advantages that outweigh its disadvantages. Media make people independent and give them freedom to raise their voice against corrupt perpetrator residing in government and private institutions. However, students are more diverted to other issues highlighted by media than their focal point, which is education.
Usages and influence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
in our life and society have
dramatically
increased around the globe over the last few years. It has become a mandatory part of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
are everywhere. Youngsters are
mostly
influenced by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its numerous benefits.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
of other age groups are
also
influenced by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
. They are using this in the form of newspapers, television, radio and internet to avail maximum advantages such as information dissemination, entertainment and latest updates of various promotions etc.
However
, the increasing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
detrimental effects on the society.

There is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
play a pivotal role in learning.
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
A large number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are using electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to complete their education assignment and projects,
for instance
, YouTube has a large volume of lectures in the form of videos to assist thousands of viewers.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has a diversity of programs to entertain its target audience. It
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to increase their knowledge about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
issues worldwide.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Media
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
increase our awareness and inform about things that are happening around us.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
it is a great tool to bring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
together.

However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has
also
increased
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
woes. In order to increase rating, they are more opted to portray
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
news and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
aspects of society that made
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tense and increased their worries.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are less perceptive to physical activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not want to skip their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
television
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
and
thus
they become lethargic that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them susceptible to illness such as laziness, obesity and anxiety. Political
Possible spelling mistake found.
biasness
, monetary gaining and vengeance are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
practices in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and that has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
detrimental effects on our society.

To sum up, I would like to say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has more advantages that outweigh its disadvantages.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
independent and give them freedom to raise their voice against corrupt perpetrator residing in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and private institutions.
However
, students are more diverted to other issues highlighted by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
than their focal point, which is education.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
22Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay It is becoming more and more difficult to escape the influence of the media on our lives. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living in a media rich society. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts