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It is a fact that people nowadays are under a lot of pressure and their lives are becoming increasingly stressful. What could be the possible reasons for this? What are some solutions to address this issue? v.1

It is a fact that people nowadays are under a lot of pressure and their lives are becoming increasingly stressful. What could be the possible reasons for this? What are some solutions to address this issue? v. 1
Stress has become part and parcel of our lives. Even young children lead stressful lives these days. Increasing competition is the number one cause of stress. Everybody wants to achieve more and more. They want to do better than their peers. People are never happy with what they have. This perpetual struggle to do better than one’s peers leads to stress and causes many health problems. The modern society glorifies workaholism. Employees are forced to burn the midnight oil to meet crazy deadlines. Cut throat competition exists in the job market and if one isn’t willing to stretch oneself thin, one can get laid off. Most people have several financial liabilities. Getting laid off is the last thing they want to happen to them. So, they work harder and harder. They don’t find time for their family or themselves. Social media also plays a role in causing stress. People post exotic images of their holidays and rant about their expensive acquisitions on social media. They have just one mission – they want to show that their lives are actually better than the lives of others. This makes their friends feel inadequate. Perhaps the biggest problem that plagues our world is the pursuit of material gains. We equate happiness with cars, villas and foreign vacations. In my opinion, the only way to beat stress is to look for meaning in life. Instead of rushing after material gains, we should look inward and connect with our true nature. Setting priorities is equally important. We should ask ourselves what we want to achieve in our lives. Once we have a clear idea of our goals, we can toil towards them at our own pace. This approach actually makes our lives a lot less stressful.
Stress
has become part and parcel of our
lives
. Even young children lead stressful
lives
these days. Increasing competition is the number one cause of
stress
. Everybody
wants
to achieve more and more. They
want
to do better than their peers.
People
are never happy with what they have. This perpetual struggle to do better than one’s peers leads to
stress
and causes
many
health problems.

The modern society glorifies
workaholism
. Employees
are forced
to burn the midnight oil to
meet
crazy deadlines.
Cut throat
competition exists in the job market and if one isn’t willing to stretch oneself thin, one can
get
laid off. Most
people
have several financial liabilities. Getting laid off is the last thing they
want
to happen to them.
So
, they work harder and harder. They don’t find time for their family or themselves.

Social media
also
plays a role in causing
stress
.
People
post exotic images of their holidays and rant about their expensive acquisitions on social media. They have
just
one mission
they
want
to
show
that their
lives
are actually better than the
lives
of others. This
makes
their friends feel inadequate.

Perhaps the biggest problem that plagues our world is the pursuit of material gains. We equate happiness with cars, villas and foreign vacations.

In my opinion, the
only
way to beat
stress
is to look for meaning in life.
Instead
of rushing after material gains, we should look inward and connect with our true nature. Setting priorities is
equally
important
. We should ask ourselves what we
want
to achieve in our
lives
. Once we have a
clear
idea
of our goals, we can toil towards them at our
own
pace. This approach actually
makes
our
lives
a lot less stressful.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay It is a fact that people nowadays are under a lot of pressure and their lives are becoming increasingly stressful. What could be the possible reasons for this? What are some solutions to address this issue? v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
291 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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