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It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. v. 2
It is sometimes argued that space exploration is a misspending investment. While I agree with this to some extent, I also believe that research into space can bring about some undeniable benefits to humanity. On the one hand, there are several reasons why investing in space research is regarded as a waste of money. Admittedly, space exploration projects usually require a huge initial investment, but it is not guaranteed that there would be some fruitful findings the projects end. As a result, this would lead to some doubts on the effectiveness of these long-term research researches. In addition, a considerable amount of money spent on exploring space would put governments under a financial pressure, resulting in a national budget cuts in more urgent issues such as improving public healthcare services or enhancing education system. Admittedly, more financial resources should be diverted to medical research to find out remedies for fatal diseases like HIV and cancer, which may help to save thousands of lives in society. On the other hand, I would argue that space exploration might have some foreseeable benefits. First, undertaking space studies would promote further technological advances as well as provide a possible means of escape should earth become uninhabitable in future, helping human beings to be less dependent on our environment and combat habitat destruction. Second, exploring space can help us to develop the capability to survive for long periods in space and even travel to other planets, which may benefit the travel industry by providing new tourist destinations and lessen the detrimental effects of overpopulation. In conclusion, despite the disadvantages of carrying out space studies, it seems to me that the advantages are more significant.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploration is a misspending investment. While I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent, I
also
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
can bring about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
undeniable benefits to humanity.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why investing in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
is regarded
as a waste of money.
Admittedly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploration projects
usually
require a huge initial investment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not guaranteed that there would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
fruitful findings the projects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.
As a result
, this would lead to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
doubts on the effectiveness of these long-term
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
researches
.
In addition
, a considerable amount of money spent on exploring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
would put
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
under a financial pressure, resulting in a national budget
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cuts
in more urgent issues such as improving public healthcare services or enhancing education system.
Admittedly
, more financial resources should
be diverted
to medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
research
to find out remedies for fatal diseases like HIV and cancer, which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to save thousands of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in society.

On the other hand
, I would argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
exploration might have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
foreseeable benefits.
First
, undertaking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
studies would promote
further
technological advances
as well
as provide a possible means of escape should earth become uninhabitable
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
, helping human beings to be less dependent on our environment and combat habitat destruction. Second, exploring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to develop the capability to survive for long periods in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
and even travel to other planets, which may benefit the travel industry by providing new tourist destinations and lessen the detrimental effects of overpopulation.

In conclusion
, despite the disadvantages of carrying out
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
space
studies, it seems to me that the advantages are more significant.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
279 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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