Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. v.3

It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. v. 3
Space research is promised to unfold the ultimate truth about the existence of the universe and the human race as a part of it. However, the outcome so far includes some rocks collected as samples, a possibility for the future colony for us and some promises to learn about other species, all of which have little to offer to uplift the human civilisation. The colossal amount of money the outer space exploration requires could surely be used to address more pressing issues at hand. To begin with, more than half of the world population live under the poverty line while an overwhelming amount of resource is drained to send a single spaceship to a  distant planet. Thus many people deeply regret the money wasted on finding a suitable planet for our future generation or to bring back some alien rocks as samples. Definitely, the first time a human landed on the moon is considered a giant leapt for the human race but from a practical point of view, it has helped us very little and sarcastically, rich countries have mostly abandoned their mission to the moon. Moreover, what good the knowledge of outer space would bring to a poor mother whose child starves and suffers from malnutrition? The fund should be spent on ensuring a decent world first. If we have so many problems on mother earth, why should we go beyond it to find solace? We need to first make a world without darkness, illiteracy, corruption, fight and hunger and then concentrate on finding some intelligent creatures on another planet. To conclude, a hungry belly cannot appreciate the delicacies of a fine art and thus a starving planet should not spend money on reaching other planets when those voyages only make promises rather than bringing anything helpful.
Space research
is promised
to unfold the ultimate truth about the existence of the universe and the
human
race as a part of it.
However
, the outcome
so
far includes
some
rocks collected as samples, a possibility for the future colony for us and
some
promises to learn about other species, all of which have
little
to offer to uplift the
human
civilisation
. The colossal amount of money the outer space exploration requires could
surely
be
used
to address more pressing issues at hand.

To
begin
with, more than half of the world population
live
under the poverty line while an overwhelming amount of resource
is drained
to
send
a single spaceship to a
 
distant
planet
.
Thus
many
people
deeply
regret the money wasted on finding a suitable
planet
for our future generation or to bring back
some
alien rocks as samples. Definitely, the
first
time a
human
landed on the moon
is considered
a giant leapt for the
human
race
but
from a practical point of view, it has
helped
us
very
little
and
sarcastically
, rich countries have
mostly
abandoned their mission to the moon.

Moreover
, what
good
the knowledge of outer space would bring to a poor mother whose child starves and suffers from malnutrition? The fund should
be spent
on ensuring a decent world
first
. If we have
so
many
problems on mother earth, why should we go beyond it to find solace? We need to
first
make
a world without darkness, illiteracy, corruption, fight and hunger and then concentrate on finding
some
intelligent creatures on another planet.

To conclude
, a hungry belly cannot appreciate the delicacies of a fine art and
thus
a starving
planet
should not spend money on reaching other
planets
when those voyages
only
make
promises
rather
than bringing anything helpful.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay It has been more than 40 years since man first landed on the moon. Some people think that space research is a waste of money. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts