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International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist do the advantage of increased tourists outweigh disadvantages v.2

International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist do the advantage of increased tourists outweigh disadvantages v. 2
It is argued that traveling abroad is increasingly becoming less expensive and nations are more likely to receive foreign people. This essay agrees that the benefits of people traveling to another country, such as the improvement in local economy and a greater relationship between governments, are stronger than the possible drawbacks. The foremost advantage of receiving international visitors is the enhancement of the economical situation of a country. As greater number of tourists a region allows to visit them, the biggest profit local government would make. Therefore, the nation become wealthier and can improve the infrastructure and supplies to the community. As consequence, the quality of life of individuals would increase. To illustrate this, traveling to Brazil is really popular destination due to the fact that the flights are economical and the access is straighforward, thus, the incomes from tourism helped the brazilian authorities to feed poor people and to build new roads. A possible drawback of receiving a plethora of visitors as a nation is the loss on the cultural identity. That is to say that regions that have a lot of tourist rounding the area, are more cosmopolitan. Hence, locals tend to be less traditional and are at risk of loosing their cultural background. For example, Peru has a lot of visitors per year and in modern times it is believed that their culture is not as unique as in former times because of the mixure of nationalities visiting the site. To conclude, there is no doubt that there are more opportunities for people to travel and easier ways to enter to a country. In my opinion the drawback of diminishing the cultural identity as a nation, is shadowed by the benefits of having a surplus incomes from tourism that permits government to make a greater profits and therefore improve people’s level of life
It
is argued
that traveling abroad is
increasingly
becoming less expensive and
nations
are more likely to receive foreign
people
. This essay
agrees
that the benefits of
people
traveling to another country, such as the improvement in local economy and a greater relationship between
governments
, are stronger than the possible drawbacks.

The foremost advantage of receiving international visitors is the enhancement of the
economical
situation of a country. As greater number of tourists a region
allows
to visit them, the biggest profit local
government
would
make
.
Therefore
, the
nation
become wealthier and can
improve
the infrastructure and supplies to the community. As consequence, the quality of life of individuals would increase. To illustrate this, traveling to Brazil is
really
popular destination due to the fact that the flights are economical and the access is
straighforward
,
thus
, the incomes from tourism
helped
the
brazilian
authorities to feed poor
people
and to build new roads.

A possible drawback of receiving a plethora of visitors as a
nation
is the loss on the cultural identity.
That is
to say that regions that have
a lot of
tourist rounding the area, are more cosmopolitan.
Hence
, locals tend to be less traditional and are at
risk
of loosing their cultural background.
For example
, Peru has
a lot of
visitors per year and in modern times it
is believed
that their culture is not as unique as in former times
because
of the
mixure
of nationalities visiting the site.

To conclude
, there is no doubt that there are more opportunities for
people
to travel and easier ways to enter to a country. In my opinion the drawback of diminishing the cultural identity as a
nation
,
is shadowed
by the benefits of having a surplus
incomes
from tourism that permits
government
to
make
a greater profits and
therefore
improve
people’s
level of
life
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
Language comes first. It’s not that language grows out of consciousness, if you haven’t got language, you can’t be conscious.
Alan Moore

IELTS essay International travel is becoming coming cheaper and countries are opening their doors to more and more tourist do the advantage of increased tourists outweigh disadvantages v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
305 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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