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International tourism has become cheaper than before, so more and more countries open their doors to tourists. Do the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh the disadvantages? v.1

International tourism has become cheaper than before, so more and more countries open their doors to tourists. Do the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1
People in several countries are facing the rise in living costs now. This leads to too many difficulties for poor people and the most suitable solution is the government’s supporting citizens with necessities. The increase in living costs is causing hardship for poor class because of rising the price of necessary goods and services such as food, rental cost, and education costs. The obvious is that poor people can’t afford these costs and this causes the quality of life is reduced. This is one of the reasons leading to the higher unemployment rate and the number of homeless people in each country. For example, according to the BBC’s survey, the number of homeless people in London in 2018 increased by half compared with the previous year because they can’t afford the rental costs. To solve this problem, the government should support citizens with fundamental areas. Some basic demands should be provided with low cost are education and medical check. The government should make sure people have the chance to be educated and healthy to improve their lives. For instance, in Vietnam’s education, public schools from primary to high school are free for all students. They need to pay for the maintenance and other services only, which leads to 100% of children in VN can go to school and reduce the financial burden for poor parents. In conclusion, while the high cost of living exerts pressures on poor class, the government should support citizens timely with basic demands. It’s predicted that the governments of many countries will begin to pay more attention to this issue and the lives of the poor will be greatly improved in the future.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
in several countries are facing the rise in living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. This leads to too
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
difficulties for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the most suitable solution is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
supporting citizens with necessities.

The increase in living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
is causing hardship for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of rising the price of necessary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and services such as food, rental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
, and education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
. The obvious is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can’t afford these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
and this causes the quality of life is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. This is one of the reasons leading to the higher unemployment rate and the number of homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in each country.
For example
, according to the BBC’s survey, the number of homeless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in London in 2018 increased by half compared with the previous year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can’t afford the rental costs.

To solve this problem, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should support citizens with fundamental areas.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
basic demands should
be provided
with low
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
are education and medical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the chance to
be educated
and healthy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
For instance
, in Vietnam’s education, public schools from primary to high school are free for all students. They need to pay for the maintenance and other services
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
, which leads to 100% of children in VN can go to school and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the financial burden for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
parents.

In conclusion
, while the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of living exerts pressures on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should support citizens timely with basic demands. It’s predicted that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
to pay more attention to this issue and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
will be
greatly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
in the future.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay International tourism has become cheaper than before, so more and more countries open their doors to tourists. Do the advantages of increasing tourism outweigh the disadvantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
277 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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