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Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at l v.4

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages? Write at l v. 4
With the advancement in the internet and software allow us to work from home or any remote place. Although some people believe this change as negative growth for society and work culture, the benefits are far more superior for companies and employees as well. I strongly agree with this notion and will explain my views in further paragraphs. Earlier, for any official work, people had to be present in their office because of technological limitations such as poor internet connectivity, software access, and inadequate hardware. For instance, to resolve an issue on client site, company needed to deploy two employees, one at client location and another at base office location. Because of seamless internet connection and new invention of software, service provider can resolve a technical issue by talking remote access to the client laptops and PCs. Is it not a win-win situation for both parties – time-saving and prompt service? Moreover, work from home is possible because of improvement in information technology as we need only one laptop and internet to communicate with our client and project members. As this culture – work from home – is beneficial for both employee and employers, many organisations are promoting this culture. For example, running cost of company will get reduced because of minimal electricity usages. At the same time, employee can give time to their family, which lead to a job satisfaction. However, no one can deny the fact that the team bonding of a team will get stronger if team member meet frequently and share their thoughts in a formal live gathering, which is not at all possible in virtual gathering like video conferencing. As a result, attachment towards office and colleagues are reduced these days. Secondly, employee may not be serious about his work as there is no one to look after him, while working from home. To sum up, even though there are few demerits of information technology such as poor bonding in team, reduced seriousness about jobs, the merits have definitely outnumbered negatives as cost reduction and employee satisfaction are the two top most priority for any organisation.
With the advancement in the internet and software
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home or any remote place. Although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
growth for society and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
culture, the benefits are far more superior for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
as well
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this notion and will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my views in
further
paragraphs.

Earlier, for any official
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
had to be present in their office
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of technological limitations such as poor internet connectivity, software access, and inadequate hardware.
For instance
, to resolve an issue on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
site,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
needed to deploy two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
, one at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
location and another at base office location.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of seamless internet connection and new invention of software, service provider can resolve a technical issue by talking remote access to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
laptops and PCs. Is it not a win-win situation for both parties
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
time-saving and prompt service?
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home is possible
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of improvement in information technology as we need
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one laptop and internet to communicate with our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
client
and project members. As this culture
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from home
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
is beneficial for both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
and employers,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
are promoting this culture.
For example
, running cost of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of minimal electricity usages. At the same time,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
can give time to their family, which lead to a job satisfaction.

However
, no one can deny the fact that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
bonding of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
stronger if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
member
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
frequently
and share their thoughts in a formal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
gathering, which is not at all possible in virtual gathering like video conferencing.
As a result
, attachment towards office and colleagues are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
these days.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
may not be serious about his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
as there is no one to look after him, while working from home.

To sum up,
even though
there are few demerits of information technology such as poor bonding in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
seriousness about jobs, the merits have definitely outnumbered negatives as cost reduction and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
satisfaction are the two top most priority for any
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefits of this mobility outweigh the disadvantages? Write at l v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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