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Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility out weight the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.2

Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility out weight the disadvantages? v. 2
In today’s world, information technology plays an absolutely essential role in people life. There is no denying to the fact that the progression rate of IT development has been increased as a result, the majority of people are more likely to get a job done anywhere and anytime at the comfortable place by using IT. This essay will discuss the benefits of this outweigh the disadvantages. Nowadays, online conferences are becoming more popular instead of long business trips that the employees have to put their time and energy. Technology has allowed us to have flexible work hours. Some people believe that this flexibility improves the quality of our life and work. Moreover, working from outside of workplaces for those who have very young children is a great opportunity. For example a lot of women quit their jobs to take care of their children. If companies allow them to work from their home, they can join the workforce again. Companies also convenience when their employees work from their house, they can save more money. On the other hand, some others argue that working from home would mix up our personal life and job together which has some undeniable determine effects on both. In addition, most individuals are following a hectic and tedious life style and have numerous tasks to do, so they do not have enough time to set aside for their job duties. They would sacrifice their family inevitably. On the whole, I personally disagree with working for instance at home or when we are on a trip and I believe that we should schedule our time and do every duty on their place instead of mixing up our duties.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world, information technology plays an
absolutely
essential role in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. There is no denying to the fact that the progression rate of IT development has
been increased
as a result
, the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are more likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
done anywhere and anytime at the comfortable place by using IT. This essay will discuss the benefits of this outweigh the disadvantages.

Nowadays, online conferences are becoming more popular
instead
of long business trips that the employees
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
put their time and energy. Technology has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
us to have flexible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
hours.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that this flexibility
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
the quality of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
Moreover
, working from outside of workplaces for those who have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
young children is a great opportunity.
For example
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
women quit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
to take care of their children. If
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from their home, they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
the workforce again.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Companies
also
convenience when their employees
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
from their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
, they can save more money.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others argue that working from home would mix up our personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
together which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
undeniable determine effects on both.
In addition
, most individuals are following a hectic and tedious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
style and have numerous tasks to do,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
time to set aside for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
duties. They would sacrifice their family
inevitably
.

On the whole
, I
personally
disagree with working
for instance
at home or when we are on a trip and I believe that we should schedule our time and do every duty on their place
instead
of mixing up our duties.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay Information technology enables many people to do their work outside their workplace. Do the benefit of this mobility out weight the disadvantages? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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