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As com putters are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. disagree or agree? v.2

As com putters are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. disagree or agree? v. 2
nowadays, after the industrial revolution, technology is more and more appointed in human growth in a plethora of fields, including education. Somebody says that, with the continuously rapid raise, hi-tech devices will soon replace teacher’s importance due to their diversity and convenient. however, I strongly disagree with this statement. Whatever, no one can deny the vital contributions of technology applicants in our life, especially in education. nowadays, thanks to them, information sources have become unlimited and contacted to everyone despite distance and languages with the minimum effort. A pupil can themselves refer lectures or lessons in any languages by the help of Google translation in only one click. Moreover, internet gives us more choices (videos, news, websites) and time. you can learn everywhere in any time you like or replay a video a thousand time until you understand lessons obviously. however, we cannot just look up to advantages computers bring about and forget the teachers’ functions because the human contact is influenced people in positive ways. Regarding psychology, talking and controvert a topic face to face with teachers helps students learn how to treating human wisely and respectively, that technology devices never be able to do. As consequences, that will form a human personality and emotion naturally. Speaking with a computer, people never have ability to smile, blink, cry because they have become a robot. Imaginably, if Steve Jobs presents with a same expression and dull tone during his century speech, no one would pleasantly following all his presentation and fall asleep instead. Last but not least, teachers are people whose the most realistic and credible experiences in real life and you can draw lessons from theirs. To conclude, although the great benefits technology brings about, teachers play an essential role in human growth, especially in nurturing people personality and behavior.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
nowadays
, after the industrial revolution,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is more and more appointed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
growth in a plethora of fields, including education. Somebody says that, with the
continuously
rapid raise, hi-tech devices will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
replace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teacher’s
importance due to their diversity and convenient.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, I
strongly
disagree with this statement.

Whatever, no one can deny the vital contributions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
applicants in our life,
especially
in education.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
nowadays
, thanks to them, information sources have become unlimited and contacted to everyone despite distance and languages with the minimum effort. A pupil can themselves refer lectures or lessons in any languages by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of Google translation in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one click.
Moreover
, internet gives us more choices (videos, news, websites) and time.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
you
can learn everywhere in any time you like or replay a video a thousand time until you understand lessons
obviously
.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, we cannot
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
look up to advantages computers bring about and forget the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers’
functions
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
contact
is influenced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
ways. Regarding psychology, talking and controvert a topic face to face with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
students learn how to treating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
wisely
and
respectively
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
devices never be able to do. As consequences, that will form a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
personality and emotion
naturally
. Speaking with a computer,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
never have ability to smile, blink, cry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have become a robot.
Imaginably
, if Steve Jobs presents with a same expression and dull tone during his century speech, no one would
pleasantly
The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: "follow"
following
all his presentation and fall asleep
instead
. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Did you mean "who's"?
whose
the most realistic and credible experiences in real life and you can draw lessons from theirs.

To conclude
, although the great
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "benefits'" or "benefit's"?
benefits
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
brings about,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teachers
play an essential role in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
growth,
especially
in nurturing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
personality and behavior.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay As com putters are being used more and more in education, there will be soon no role for teachers in the classroom. disagree or agree? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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