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In your opinion should government intervene in the rights of the individual with regard to family planning v.2

In your opinion should government intervene in the rights of the individual with regard to family planning v. 2
Every couple has right to do family planning as per their convenience. As per my view government should interfere in this matter if growing population is damaging country’s economy. Earth population is nowadays increasing rapidly. There are very few resources available for sharing with others. In such type of critical situation every nation requires to some strict laws on family planning to survive in the world. Natural resources like petroleum is on verge of extinction and if population of country increases at such high rate then government cannot provide basic facilities like education, medical, food and water to each and every citizen. It is also difficult task to manage such a high population. Populous countries like India and China have highest development rate in the world but because of their huge population they are still way behind in the list of human development index. It is also difficult to manage big family as we require ample amount of money and time to fulfill their basic needs. If government does not interfere in this matter then this will also create problems for other people. Traffic problems, environment issues and global warming are the best example of it. To avoid such problems government should implement rules on family planning. Moreover, huge population creates more demand and to fulfill them government requires more resources, finance and infrastructure. Sometimes they have to depend on other countries for this and that will slow down development of the nation. In conclusion, I think that government should implement rules on family planning if they are necessary for overall development of the country.
Every couple has right to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
planning as per their convenience. As per my view
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should interfere in this matter if growing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is damaging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country’s
economy.

Earth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is nowadays increasing
rapidly
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few resources available for sharing with others. In such type of critical situation every nation requires to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
strict laws on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
planning to survive in the world. Natural resources like petroleum is on verge of extinction and if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
increases at such high rate then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
cannot provide basic facilities like education, medical, food and water to each and every citizen. It is
also
difficult task to manage such a high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
. Populous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like India and China have
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
rate in the world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of their huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
they are
still
way behind in the list of human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
index.

It is
also
difficult to manage
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
as we require ample amount of money and time to fulfill their basic needs. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
does not interfere in this matter then this will
also
create problems for other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. Traffic problems, environment issues and global warming are the best example of it. To avoid such
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "problems'" or "problem's"?
problems
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should implement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
planning.

Moreover
, huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
creates more demand and to fulfill them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
requires more resources, finance and infrastructure.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
depend on other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
for this and that will slow down
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of the nation.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should implement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
planning if they are necessary for
overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
development
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay In your opinion should government intervene in the rights of the individual with regard to family planning v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
265 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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