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Some people feel that animals should have the same rights as humans, but others think they are not as equal or intelligent as us so should not have the same rights. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion. v.2

Some people feel that animals should have the same rights as humans, but others think they are not as equal or intelligent as us so should not have the same rights. v. 2
In Christianisty, people believe that one of the assignments to mankind from god is to govern all living creatures. However, with several millenniums passing by, god would frown upon the widening disparity between animals and humans in which animals indisputably are exploited by human in many aspects such as food and drug testing. This status quo between animals and human has been sparked a hot debate over a decade. In this essay, the argument of both opponent will be presented along with some of my opinion. To begin with the people who advocate to the animal' s right, the compelling argument is that animals are living creature and have made no differences as human, so much so that animals also posses emotional feeling such as happiness and sadness like what humans have. To illustrate, crying is undoubtedly one of the human intrinsic behavior. It is not rare to hear from the news that the cattle was crying before they got slaughtered, thus proving that the cattle cry because of fearing to death, behaving exactly the same as human. Owning to the similarity to the human, the basic interests like avoiding unnecessary suffering of human should also considerately extend to all animals. Not all the people, on the other hand, are sympathy on the suffering of the animals encountered and they hold the belief that this is just an example of the rule of the jungle in which the stronger animals can take the weaker one. While human has considerable higher intelligence than all other animals, they can circumvent the animals effortlessly. In this way, the relationship between animals and human is just as simple as the relationship between predator and prey. Humans are just following the basic rule of the earth. In my perspective, contrary to the higher intelligent human can take the comparatively inferior animals, we should, instead, make use of our intelligent to create a better rule for all living things so that all animals can have equals to enjoy their life. Even though utopia is just an imaginative depiction, with our full effort, I believe this picture will eventually become reality.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
Christianisty
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that one of the assignments to mankind from god is to govern all living creatures.
However
, with several millenniums passing by, god would frown upon the widening disparity between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
indisputably
are exploited
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects such as food and drug testing. This status quo between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
has
been sparked
a hot debate over a decade. In this essay, the argument of both opponent will
be presented
along with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of my opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who advocate to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
animal&
#039; s right, the compelling argument is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are living creature and have made no differences as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
also
posses emotional feeling such as happiness and sadness like what
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
have. To illustrate, crying is
undoubtedly
one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
intrinsic behavior. It is not rare to hear from the news that the cattle was crying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
slaughtered,
thus
proving that the cattle cry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of fearing to death, behaving exactly the same as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
. Owning to the similarity to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
, the basic interests like avoiding unnecessary
The usual preposition for this expression is "from" or "with." Did you mean "suffering from" or "suffering with"?
suffering of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
should
also
considerately
extend to all animals.

Not all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
on the other hand
, are sympathy on the suffering of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
encountered and
they hold the belief that this is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
an example of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of the jungle in which the stronger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can take the weaker one. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
has considerable higher intelligence than all other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, they can circumvent the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
effortlessly
. In this way, the relationship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
as simple as the relationship between predator and prey.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Humans
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
following the basic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
of the earth.

In my perspective, contrary to the higher intelligent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
can take the
comparatively
inferior
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, we should,
instead
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of our intelligent to create a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rule
for all living things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
can have equals to enjoy their life.
Even though
utopia is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
an imaginative depiction, with our full effort, I believe this picture will
eventually
become reality.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people feel that animals should have the same rights as humans, but others think they are not as equal or intelligent as us so should not have the same rights. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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