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In today’s society, both Western medicine and traditional, complementary forms of medicines are now widely known and used. The effectiveness oft kinds of treatment is determined by the patient's mental attitude towards it. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.1

In today’s society, both Western medicine and traditional, complementary forms of medicines are now widely known and used. The effectiveness oft kinds of treatment is determined by the patient's mental attitude towards it. v. 1
In the modern world, the medicines both Western and traditional have their importance and many diseases can be cured effectively. People have a perception that only medicines and treatments cannot cure a patient, but it is their attitude towards the treatment that makes the patient get better. I agree with this opinion, because effectual drugs are taken by people, but their anxiety about the disease gets reduced only by their belief. Firstly, the traditional medicine is very common among people from an early period and people have a strong faith in these drugs, because it is beneficial in curing the disease, besides they are no after effects. However, it is factual because after getting healed people must become active and brisk rather than pale, lifeless. For instance, if children or any family members are down with fever and cold, then the mothers will automatically turn to their kitchen and prepare herbal medicines using pepper, garlic, honey and ginger, and feed them the juice, because they believe it cures the problem better than modern drugs. Secondly, the modern remedies can also heal our pain and problems with a low cost which is the viewpoint of many others. Indeed, this can be true in some cases, but the cost of modern treatment is also high. However, keeping the cost apart, it reduces our illness within a short-period of time. Therefore, the intuition of many people in the present day is that because of the chemical quantity in the drugs are high, it can restore our health in a better manner. For example, Vicks Action 500 is helping people to get relieved from headache instantaneously and the sales of this medicine are very high in the pharmaceutical, because they believe that only modern treatments can treat them successfully. In conclusion, whatever be the treatments or drugs swallowed by the people, it their thinking towards the therapy that makes them feel better and restore their health.
In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
world, the medicines both Western and traditional have their importance and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
diseases can
be cured
effectively
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have a perception that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
medicines and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
cannot cure a patient,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is their attitude towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the patient
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
effectual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
are taken
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
their anxiety about the disease
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
by their belief.

Firstly
, the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from an early period and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have a strong faith in these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is beneficial in curing the disease,
besides
they are
Did you mean "now" (=at this moment) instead of 'no' (negation)?
no
after effects.
However
, it is factual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
after getting healed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
become active and brisk
rather
than pale, lifeless.
For instance
, if children or any family members are down with fever and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
, then the mothers will
automatically
turn to their kitchen and prepare herbal medicines using pepper, garlic, honey and ginger, and feed them the juice,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe it cures the problem
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
drugs.

Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
remedies can
also
heal our pain and problems with a low cost which is the viewpoint of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others.
Indeed
, this can be true in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the cost of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatment
is
also
high.
However
, keeping the cost apart, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
our illness within a short-period of time.
Therefore
, the intuition of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the present day is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the chemical quantity in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
are high, it can restore our health in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
manner.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Vicks
Action 500 is helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
relieved from headache
instantaneously
and the sales of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medicine
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
high in the pharmaceutical,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
can treat them
successfully
.

In conclusion
, whatever be the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
treatments
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drugs
swallowed by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it their thinking towards the therapy that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
and restore their health.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay In today’s society, both Western medicine and traditional, complementary forms of medicines are now widely known and used. The effectiveness oft kinds of treatment is determined by the patient's mental attitude towards it. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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