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"Prevention is better than cure. " Out of a country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? v.28

"Prevention is better than cure. " Out of a country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. with this statement? v. 28
In recent times, some of the life threatening diseases pose a stiff challenge to the mankind. Owing to this, most of the countries have realised to allocate a major part of their gross domestic product towards healthcare along with the steps taken to completely offset those fatal viruses, which are causing earlier death and other epidemic illnesses. I would argue that, although I completely agree that effective spending must to be done towards preventing actions, I have some hesitations in losing focus from the treatment areas. To begin, with the advances made in the medical industry, most of the endemic diseases have been eradicated. For example, the small pox and the measles were once considered as illnesses for which there were not much effective medicine. Furthermore, these diseases have swallowed innumerable lives. To counter this, countries started spending their major part of their budget towards inventing new medicines to quell these diseases. Thanks to these efforts, by which most of those terrifying viruses have been eliminated. Having said that, can we afford to live by directing the majority of the funds toward preventive medical inventions alone? If it happens, the government would become insolvent and it becomes financially incapable to meet its other important liabilities such as giving free medical treatment, sanitary management and free education to the poor and the impoverished ones. For example, if a country spends money only on cancer alleviation drugs, then it would not have the funds to treat people who suffer from other ailments like diabetes and stroke. To conclude, allocating funds for preventing medical steps is appreciated and welcomed with red carpet. However, there are various other needs that a government has to do besides spending a major chunk of money in medical research. A sustainable development is a development that can happen collectively across all the fields and not just towards medicinal values alone.
In recent times,
some of the
life threatening
diseases
pose a stiff challenge to the mankind. Owing to this, most of the countries have
realised
to allocate a major part of their gross domestic product towards healthcare along with the steps taken to completely offset those fatal viruses, which are causing earlier death and
other
epidemic illnesses. I would argue that, although I completely
agree
that effective spending
must to
be done
towards preventing actions, I have
some
hesitations in losing focus from the treatment areas.

To
begin
, with the advances made in the
medical
industry, most of the endemic
diseases
have
been eradicated
.
For example
, the
small
pox and the measles were once considered as illnesses for which there were not much effective medicine.
Furthermore
, these
diseases
have swallowed innumerable
lives
. To counter this, countries
started
spending their major part of their budget towards inventing new medicines to quell these
diseases
. Thanks to these efforts, by which most of those terrifying viruses have
been eliminated
.

Having said that, can we afford to
live
by directing the majority of the funds toward preventive
medical
inventions alone? If it happens, the
government
would become insolvent and it becomes
financially
incapable to
meet
its
other
important
liabilities such as giving free
medical
treatment, sanitary management and free education to the poor and the impoverished ones.
For example
, if a country spends money
only
on cancer alleviation drugs, then it would not have the funds to treat
people
who suffer from
other
ailments like diabetes and stroke.

To conclude
, allocating funds for preventing
medical
steps
is appreciated
and welcomed with red carpet.
However
, there are various
other
needs that a
government
has to
do
besides
spending a major chunk of money in
medical
research. A sustainable development is a development that can happen
collectively
across all the fields and not
just
towards medicinal values alone.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Learn a new language and get a new soul.
Czech Proverb

IELTS essay "Prevention is better than cure. " Out of a country's health budget, a large proportion should be diverted from treatment to spending on health education and preventative measures. with this statement? v. 28

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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