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In the recent years children are forced to study even in their leisure time. Is this a good practice? Do you agree or disagree? v.1

In the recent years children are forced to study even in their leisure time. Is this a good practice? v. 1
Throughout the human history education has been considered as one of the key components of success in life. However, everything is good in balance and education is not an exception. Thus, I disagree with the belief that pushing kids to study at their spare time would be extremely beneficial for them. Some philosophers say that education kills imagination. When a person starts gathering new information from different books and lectures, they use a material that has already been explored by someone else. As we know, childhood tend to be one of the most adventurous moments when everything is new and unexplained. If kids are forced to spend all of their time on studies, they will not have enough time for explorations. In addition, there are numerous facts that prove that a human brain is capable of memorizing a certain amount of information, when the limit is reached people stop understanding and memorizing any new material. Therefore, it is essential to give our brain a rest from time to time in order to maintain the ability to receive and analyse new information. Otherwise, any education will be simply a waste of time and money. To recapitulate, it is necessary to say that childhood is a unique and unforgettable moment of our lives. Most importantly, by overfilling it with books, studies, and schools parents do not help their kids to become future great philosophers and thinkers. On the contrary, they prevent them from developing a creative mindset that is so important in fields such as entrepreneurship, art, and science.
Throughout the human history
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
has
been considered
as one of the key components of success in life.
However
, everything is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in balance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is not an exception.
Thus
, I disagree with the belief that pushing kids to study at their spare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
would be
extremely
beneficial for them.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
philosophers say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
kills imagination. When a person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
gathering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
information from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
books and lectures, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a material that has already
been explored
by someone else. As we know, childhood tend to be one of the most adventurous moments when everything is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
and unexplained. If kids
are forced
to spend all of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on studies, they will not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for explorations.

In addition
, there are numerous facts that prove that a human brain is capable of memorizing a certain amount of information, when the limit
is reached
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
understanding and memorizing any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
material.
Therefore
, it is essential to give our brain a rest from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in order to maintain the ability to receive and
Possible spelling mistake. 'analyse' is British English.
analyse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
information.
Otherwise
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
will be
simply
a waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and money.

To recapitulate, it is necessary to say that childhood is a unique and unforgettable moment of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Most
importantly
, by overfilling it with books, studies, and schools parents do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their kids to become future great philosophers and thinkers.
On the contrary
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
them from developing a creative mindset
that is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in fields such as entrepreneurship, art, and science.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
14Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
One who speaks only one language is one person, but one who speaks two languages is two people.
Turkish proverb

IELTS essay In the recent years children are forced to study even in their leisure time. Is this a good practice? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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