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In the past, people lived in one place for a long time, but now they can live in many different places, what are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development？ v.1

In the past, people lived in one place for a long time, but now they can live in many different places, what are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development？ v. 1
In recent world, it is a common phenomenon that people live in different places throughout their life. However, it is unusual for people to move their living place who lived in the past. This essay will illustrate the reasons for this phenomenon and convince that why this is a great tendency. In the past, it is hardly any to move about as there is fewer means of transportation. Agriculture was the backbone of economy and many farmers cultivated the land where near the places they lived. Furthermore, most of them reared livestock. With the advancement and development in transportation facilities it convenient and affordable to travel around. They can travel by land, water and air which is almost impossible in the past. For instance, trains and air flights shorten the distance and time to move around and encourage villagers to leaves their hometown and migrate to urban areas for searching a new life. This is definitely a positive trend because it makes life more challenging and interesting. Every time we live in a new place we get interact with people of different cultures and style of livings. It give us a priceless opportunity to broaden our horizon of thinking, make us more tolerant and respect the cultures of others. Living in the same place will limit our understanding about the world we live, there are still many different and interesting things around the world which is worth to learn, experience and explore. To conclude, industrialization and improvement in means of transportation are the factors that encourage people to move around. This is undoubtedly a good development which can boost the economy growth and fosters cultural mingling.
In recent world, it is a common phenomenon that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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places
throughout their life.
However
, it is unusual for
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people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
their living
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place
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in the past. This essay will illustrate the reasons for this phenomenon and convince that why this is a great tendency.

In the past, it is hardly any to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
about as there is fewer means of transportation. Agriculture was the backbone of economy and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
farmers cultivated the land where near the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
.
Furthermore
, most of them reared livestock. With the advancement and development in transportation facilities
Did you mean "is" or "it is"?
it
convenient and affordable to travel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
. They can travel by land, water and air which is almost impossible in the past.
For instance
, trains and air flights shorten the distance and time to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
and encourage villagers to
Did you mean "leaf", "leave"?
leaves
their hometown and migrate to urban areas for searching a new life.

This is definitely a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
trend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life more challenging and interesting. Every time we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a new
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place
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
interact with
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people
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cultures and style of livings. It
Did you mean "gives"?
give
us a priceless opportunity to broaden our horizon of thinking,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us more tolerant and respect the cultures of others. Living in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
will limit our understanding about the world we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
, there are
still
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
and interesting things
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
the world which is worth to learn, experience and explore.

To conclude
, industrialization and improvement in means of transportation are the factors that encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
move
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
. This is
undoubtedly
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
development which can boost the economy growth and fosters cultural mingling.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay In the past, people lived in one place for a long time, but now they can live in many different places, what are the reasons? Is this a positive or negative development？ v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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