Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts subjects (e. g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e. g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed? Do you agree or disagree? v.3

In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts subjects (e. g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e. g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed? v. 3
The debate weather this tendency of girls to prefer art subjects and boys to prefer science subjects should be changed has become a matter of discussion among many. Personally, I believe this tendency should be changed. In this essay, I shall be providing arguments and examples to support my view and discuss the reasons behind it. To begin with, the main reason behind such discriminative preferences among boys and girls is the pressure from the parents. For example, even today in some countries people still believe that women should refrain from jobs that are usually precieved as manly, and often applying the same belief on their childern. This leads to girls choosing only a certain type of career in early stages. In addition, statistics have shown that a large percentage of companies usually hire females for non-technical jobs, this leads to smaller number of vacancies available for females in technical based jobs. Such scarsity of employment in scientific field is another reason for girls seeking career in arts subjects. Moreover, changing such tendencies is necessary and could prove to be beneficial to many girls. For example, many girls who are intrested in making a career in science, will no longer feel pressurised from family and friends to make different decision. Furthermore, as more girls are encouraged to explore various career options in scientific field, this could leads to creating higher job opportunities. In conclusion, I firmly believe that girls should be encouraged to change their older tendency and seek more career options. In future, we can expect to see improvement, as our society becomes more aware of such underlying social issues.
The debate weather this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tendency
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
to prefer art subjects and boys to prefer science subjects should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
has become a matter of discussion among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.
Personally
, I believe this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tendency
should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. In this essay, I shall be providing arguments and examples to support my view and discuss the reasons behind it.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the main reason behind such
Possible spelling mistake found.
discriminative
preferences among boys and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
is the pressure from the parents.
For example
, even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
still
believe that women should refrain from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
that are
usually
Possible spelling mistake found.
precieved
as
manly
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
applying the same belief on their
Possible spelling mistake found.
childern
. This leads to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
choosing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a certain type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
in early stages.
In addition
, statistics have shown that a large percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
usually
hire females for non-technical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, this leads to smaller number of vacancies available for females in technical based
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
. Such
Possible spelling mistake found.
scarsity
of employment in scientific field is another reason for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
seeking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
in arts subjects.

Moreover
, changing such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tendencies
is necessary and could prove to be beneficial to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
who are
Possible spelling mistake found.
intrested
in making a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
in science, will no longer feel
Possible spelling mistake. 'pressurised' is British English.
pressurised
from family and friends to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
decision.
Furthermore
, as more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
are encouraged
to explore various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
options in scientific field, this could
The verb 'could' requires the base form of the verb: "lead"
leads
to creating higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities.

In conclusion
, I
firmly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
girls
should
be encouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tendency
and seek more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
career
options.
Did you mean: "In the future"?
In future
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
improvement, as our society becomes more aware of such underlying social issues.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some schools and universities, girls tend to choose arts subjects (e. g. literature), and boys tend to choose science subjects (e. g. physics). Why do you think this is so? Should this tendency be changed? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
271 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts