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In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v.3

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v. 3
Some people are of the opinion that some nations have body mass increase while having deteriorating health conditions. I totally support this notion because a lot of individuals indulge in unhealthy eating habits. Furthermore, the government is passively involved in the health patterns of the nation. Firstly, a lot of people eat unhealthy foods. This has a ripple effect on the levels of health and interest in exercise. For instance, any individual who eats fast foods often is expected to have several health related disease as reported by several studies. Firstly, a lot of people eat unhealthy foods. This has a ripple effect on the levels of health and interest in exercise. For instance, any individual who eats fast foods often is expected to have several health related disease as reported by several studies. Firstly, a lot of people eat unhealthy foods. This has a ripple effect on the levels of health and interest in exercise. For instance, any individual who eats fast foods often is expected to have several health related disease as reported by several studies. Firstly, a lot of people eat unhealthy foods. This has a ripple effect on the levels of health and interest in exercise. For instance, any individual who eats fast foods often is expected to have several health related disease as reported by several studies. In conclusion, we believe that the government should be involved in providing health facilities and incentives to allow citizens actively participate in exercise. In conclusion, we believe that the government should be involved in providing health facilities and incentives to allow citizens actively participate in exercise.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the opinion that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
nations have body mass increase while having deteriorating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
conditions. I
totally
support this notion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
indulge in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
eating habits.
Furthermore
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
is
passively
involved in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
patterns of the nation.

Firstly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This has a ripple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
instance
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eats
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expected
to have several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reported
by several studies.
Firstly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This has a ripple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
instance
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eats
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expected
to have several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reported
by several studies.

Firstly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This has a ripple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
instance
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eats
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expected
to have several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reported
by several studies.
Firstly
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
. This has a ripple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
levels
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interest
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
. For
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
instance
, any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
eats
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
expected
to have several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disease
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reported
by several studies.

In conclusion
, we believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
be involved
in providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
facilities and incentives to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
citizens
actively
participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
.
In conclusion
, we believe that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
be involved
in providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
facilities and incentives to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
citizens
actively
participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
98Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
268 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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