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In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v.13

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v. 13
The mean weight of people living in different countries is rising and this leads to reduced their levels of health and fitness. I personally believe that the sedentary lifestyle is the real cause of this problem. However, a balanced diet and do a proper amount of exercise is considered to be the appropriate measures to solve these problems. In this era, many people have adopted sedentary lifestyle. They do not want to do any physical activities or to take part in any outdoor activity in their leisure time. They are not interested to go to the gym or have to do any exercise on their own. All the time they are craving for food and use their mobile phones. Furthermore, they rely themselves on to the junk foods which contains a huge amount of fat. Moreover, they do not show any interest in brisk walk even they use their vehicles for short distances. We can also say due to these comfortability to transport people forgot to walk on their feet and this lead to increase their obesity levels. On the other hand, if people have a healthy diet, they will easily overcome these problems. In this modern age, everybody knows its body mass index, so they should take a balanced diet, which diet, which comprises of different items to maintain their body mass index. In addition, they should do exercise and make it part and parcel of their lives. People rely on healthy food that meet their nutrition level and seldom eat junk food. They do not entirely depend on their vehicles, also use their feet for short distances. To conclude, proper healthy lifestyle and balance diet are mandatory to reduce obesity in the world.
The mean weight of
people
living in
different
countries is rising and this leads to
reduced
their levels of health and fitness. I
personally
believe that the sedentary lifestyle is the real cause of this problem.
However
, a balanced diet and do a proper amount of exercise
is considered
to be the appropriate measures to solve these problems.

In this era,
many
people
have adopted sedentary lifestyle. They do not want to do any physical activities or to
take part
in any outdoor activity in their leisure time. They are not interested to go to the gym or
have to
do any exercise on their
own
. All the time they are craving for
food
and
use
their mobile phones.
Furthermore
, they rely themselves on to the junk
foods
which contains a huge amount of
fat
.
Moreover
, they do not
show
any interest in brisk walk even they
use
their vehicles for short distances. We can
also
say due to
these comfortability
to transport
people
forgot to walk on their feet and this lead to increase their obesity levels.

On the other hand
, if
people
have a healthy diet, they will
easily
overcome these problems. In this modern age, everybody knows its body mass index,
so
they should take a balanced diet, which diet, which
comprises of
different
items to maintain their body mass index.
In addition
, they should do exercise and
make
it part and parcel of their
lives
.
People
rely on healthy
food
that
meet
their nutrition level and seldom eat junk
food
. They do not
entirely
depend on their vehicles,
also
use
their feet for short distances.

To conclude
, proper healthy lifestyle and balance diet are mandatory to
reduce
obesity in the world.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them? v. 13

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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