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In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views? v.4

In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views? v. 4
The age at which a child starts formal education varies across different countries. Parents in seldom countries tend to make their children start school at an early stage of life, while others think that formal education should start at a later age. This essay will discuss why a child must start school at seven or eight years. The first and foremost reason is that it is believed that children who start education at four years tend to be smarter. Going to an educational institute early develops confidence in a person and helps him make friends. Moreover, early admitted students establish a notable relationship with their teachers too. However, carrying a bag full of books can give rise to health-related issues as it is a tiresome task. Although these students have to stay away their parents, they might come out as a successful one. On the contrary, to the first reason, parents get their child admitted to an educational institute at the age of seven or eight years. These children are believed to be much healthier as they have been provided enough nutrition at home, while they bear zero responsibilities. A strong bond also exists between parent and kid as they have spent a lot of time together. However, these students lack initially in their classrooms as they start late; but they cope up fast enough to be called a good student. After all, the health and happiness should be the topmost priority of parents. In conclusion, early admission might make a student more successful but unhealthy. Hence late joining in school should be preferred more.
The age at which a child
starts
formal education varies across
different
countries.
Parents
in seldom countries tend to
make
their children
start
school at an
early
stage of life, while others
think
that formal education should
start
at a later age. This essay will discuss why a child
must
start
school at seven or eight years.

The
first
and foremost reason is that it
is believed
that children who
start
education at four years tend to be smarter. Going to an educational institute
early
develops confidence in a person and
helps
him
make
friends.
Moreover
,
early
admitted
students
establish a notable relationship with their teachers too.
However
, carrying a bag full of books can give rise to health-related issues as it is a tiresome task. Although these
students
have to
stay away their
parents
, they might
come
out as a successful one.

On the contrary
, to the
first
reason,
parents
get
their child admitted to an educational institute at the age of seven or eight years. These children
are believed
to be much healthier as they have
been provided
enough
nutrition at home, while they bear zero responsibilities. A strong bond
also
exists between
parent
and kid as they have spent
a lot of
time together.
However
, these
students
lack
initially
in their classrooms as they
start
late;
but
they cope up
fast
enough
to
be called
a
good
student
.
After all
, the health and happiness should be the topmost priority of parents.

In conclusion
,
early
admission might
make
a
student
more successful
but
unhealthy.
Hence
late joining in school should
be preferred
more.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay In some countries it is thought advisable that children begin formal education at four years old, while in others they do not have to start school until they are seven or eight. How far do you agree with either of these views? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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