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In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this? v.28

In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this? v. 28
No one can deny the fact that the United States impose curfew in certain areas to prevent youngsters from roaming around during night time without adults. I strongly agree with this method because it will reduce the risk of meeting strange situations with teenagers. To begin with, some regions in the US are categorized as not suitable for children go alone since some gangster people are ruling these places at night in particular. These people are always engaged in inhuman activities so that juveniles always need the protection of a guardian. For instance, if a child walks alone in one of these streets during off-peak hours, he or she is more likely to be caught by gangsters, and that will cause to put their lives in danger. Therefore, implement such rules is necessary to secure the lives of the next generation in the country. In addition, some parts of the country have dangerous nocturnal animals who come out from their habitats at night. Many adolescents are not aware of the prevention methods in an animal attack so that they need some experienced person to deal with in case of a dangerous situation. Besides, when children are accompanied by adults, they will get the opportunity to learn these skills which are required for self-protection when they become adults. In certain areas in California, for instance, are surrounded by jungles so that children in these areas always need the assistance of elders to walk on the road. In conclusion, the legislation of rules to stop going out of the young children without adults during the night time is necessary because that will reduce the chance of getting caught to gangsters, and they will be able to avoid attacks from dangerous animals.
No one can deny the fact that the United States impose curfew in certain areas to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
youngsters from roaming around during
This word is normally spelled as one.
night time
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this method
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
of meeting strange situations with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
regions in the US
are categorized
as not suitable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
go alone since
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
gangster
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are ruling these places at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
in particular
. These
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are always engaged in inhuman activities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that juveniles always need the protection of a guardian.
For instance
, if a child walks alone in one of these streets during off-peak hours, he or she is more likely to
be caught
by gangsters, and that will cause to put their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
.
Therefore
, implement such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
is necessary to secure the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of the
next
generation in the country.

In addition
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the country have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
nocturnal animals who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
out from their habitats at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
night
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
adolescents are not aware of the prevention methods in an animal attack
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
experienced person to deal with in case of a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
situation.
Besides
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are accompanied
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the opportunity to learn these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
which
are required
for self-protection when they become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
. In certain areas in California,
for instance
,
are surrounded
by jungles
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in these areas always need the assistance of elders to walk on the road.

In conclusion
, the legislation of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
going out of the young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
without
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
adults
during the
This word is normally spelled as one.
night time
is necessary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the chance of getting caught to gangsters, and they will be able to avoid attacks from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
animals.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In some areas of the US, a 'curfew' is imposed, in which teenagers are not allowed to be out of doors after a particular time at night unless they are are accompanied by an adult. What is your opinion about this? v. 28

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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