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In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use the money to improve public transportation. v.15

In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use the money to improve public transportation. v. 15
Following the industrialisation, the car has become one of the most commonly owned items. With cars we can travel miles within minutes, it made our life so much easier.   However, all the things have two sides, cars bring us convenience but it also creates problems for us. Almost every major city on earth is suffering from the heavy amount of traffics on roads which often cause congestion. It waste the time of people, cause pollution due to the harmful gas eliminated by cars, also makes people feel frustrated. If the government decides to impose a heavy tax on private car owners, some people will probably get rid of the excessive cars. When people make the decision to purchase a car, they will also take the cost of heavy taxes into considerations, and may, in the end, postpone their plan of having a car. The policy can restrict the growing demand for cars. However, since the tax applies to all private cars. Thus, the tax will increase the financial burden for car owners. There are no discriminations between the cars in major cities and the cars in the rural and remote areas. This means it may not restrict the amount of car flow in the central business district in the city, where the traffic problem is more severe. Some of the people who are not in a good financial position, but must have a car to travel to work will suffer. If they cannot afford the tax, they will dispose their cars and loose their jobs. In summary, I reckon the government should take all these factors into consideration before start taxing private car owners. The government should come out with a better solution that pinpoints the traffic jam, but not private cars in generally.
Following the
industrialisation
, the
car
has become one of the most
commonly
owned
items. With
cars we
can travel miles within minutes, it made our life
so
much easier.
 
However
, all the things have two sides,
cars
bring us convenience
but
it
also
creates problems for us.

Almost every major city on earth is suffering from the heavy amount of traffics on roads which
often
cause congestion. It
waste
the time of
people
, cause pollution due to the harmful gas eliminated by
cars
,
also
makes
people
feel frustrated. If the
government
decides to impose a heavy
tax
on
private
car
owners,
some
people
will
probably
get
rid of the excessive
cars
. When
people
make
the decision to
purchase
a
car
, they will
also
take the cost of heavy
taxes
into considerations, and may, in the
end
, postpone their plan of having a
car
. The policy can restrict the growing demand for cars.

However
, since the
tax
applies to
all
private
cars
.
Thus
, the
tax
will increase the financial burden for
car
owners. There are no discriminations between the
cars
in major cities and the
cars
in the rural and remote areas. This means it may not restrict the amount of
car
flow in the central business district in the city, where the traffic problem is more severe.
Some of the
people
who are not in a
good
financial position,
but
must
have a
car
to travel to work will suffer. If they cannot afford the
tax
, they will dispose their
cars
and
loose
their jobs.

In summary, I reckon the
government
should take all these factors into consideration
before
start
taxing
private
car
owners. The
government
should
come
out with a better solution that pinpoints the traffic jam,
but
not
private
cars
in
generally
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
31Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay In order to solve traffic problems, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use the money to improve public transportation. v. 15

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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