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In many countries its now illegal to smoke in public spaces. it's only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. Do you agree or disagree? v.2

In many countries its now illegal to smoke in public spaces. it's only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. v. 2
Smoking nowadays has become very common habit between lots of people. However, plethora of countries have imposed some rules to mitigate such bad behavior in public places such like closed offices and buildings, so smokers have to leave such places into other allocated areas for smoking. In my point of view, I totally agree and this essay will discuss the dangerous effects of smoking in public places in further detail before coming to conclusion. Firstly, with no doubt,   smoking is very harmful practice for all individuals. For instance, smoking is the main cause of the sudden death, hypertension, and other heart diseases. Therefore, banning such extremely bad habit to be performed in public areas, will participate in minimizing it. Since the smokers feel, they are being more isolated and thats might motivated them to quit it. Secondly, since smoking in general is unhealthy behavior, it' s one of the governments imperatives is to keep regular people away from such serious effects. To illustrate, it' s irrefutable that passive smokers who are exposed to bad smokes, will be suffered from same illnesses that the regular smokers have. Thus, prohibition such detrimental habit will maintain other people health. Thirdly, public areas are for all people, and smoking in any place will make it very dirty and messy. The smoking area in any airport as an example, is one of the most untidy place and has a bad smell. Therefore, all people have the right to work and stay in clean environment. Finally, smoking is the main source of extremely serious disaster. For example, the major reason of fires worldwide especially in forests is the cigarettes. Many careless people unfortunately, smoking in such places and causing a real catastrophe. Such fire indeed, costs communities lots of efforts as well as money in order to fighting it. In conclusion, people have the full right to live in healthy environment away from any dangerous habit like smoking. Therefore, I strongly agree that smoking in public places should be totally blocked.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Smoking
nowadays has become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
between lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
However
, plethora of countries have imposed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
to mitigate such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
behavior in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
such like closed offices and buildings,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
smokers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
into other allocated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
. In my point of view, I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
and this essay will discuss the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
in
further
detail
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
coming to conclusion.

Firstly
, with no doubt,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
  smoking
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
harmful practice for all individuals.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
is the main cause of the sudden death, hypertension, and other heart diseases.
Therefore
, banning such
extremely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
to
be performed
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
, will participate in minimizing it. Since the smokers feel, they are being more isolated and
Possible spelling mistake found
thats
might motivated them to quit it.
Secondly
, since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in general
is unhealthy behavior,
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s one of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
imperatives is to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
away from such serious effects. To illustrate,
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s irrefutable that passive smokers who
are exposed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
smokes, will
be suffered
from same illnesses that the regular smokers have.
Thus
, prohibition such detrimental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
will maintain other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
health.

Thirdly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
areas
are for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
dirty and messy. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
area
in any airport as an example, is one of the most untidy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bad
smell.
Therefore
, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the right to work and stay in clean environment.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
is the main source of
extremely
serious disaster.
For example
, the major reason of fires worldwide
especially
in forests is the cigarettes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
careless
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
unfortunately,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
and causing a real catastrophe. Such fire
indeed
, costs communities lots of efforts
as well
as money in order to
Did you mean "fight"?
fighting
it.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the full right to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in healthy environment away from any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
habit
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
.
Therefore
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
smoking
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
should be
totally
blocked.
20Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
43Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries its now illegal to smoke in public spaces. it's only fair that people who wish to smoke should have to leave the building. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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