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In many countries in the world, some people can earn extremely high salaries. some people think that this is good for a country. others think that the government should not allow salaries above a certain level. discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

In many countries in the world, some people can earn extremely high salaries. some people think that this is good for a country. others think that the government should not allow salaries above a certain level. v. 2
As a result of globalization, skilled workers are welcomed and paid high salary in most of the developed countries. Salary varies depending on job and effort needed. Few suggest that government should control the salary scale and establish a limit for it, while few oppose the view. This essay discusses both views and will draw a conclusion. People migrate to different counties in search of a lucrative job, and many cooperative business entrepreneurs attract professionals by offering high salaries and through other fringe benefits. For example, many IT employees are relocating to the US from India in search of better financial support. If an employee is paid well, he will work sincerely and happily for the company. Eventually, this will help in the company development and leads to the overall development of the country. In the same way, many people who work abroad send money to their family, this indeed will improve the foreign exchange and economic growth of the parent country as well. On the contrary, based on the salary tax and other obligations also will increase, this will invite more chaos. For example, based on income all citizens have to pay tax and other due to the government. Moreover, in many countries salary is not paid equally and discriminations in payment may lead to more perplexities. Secondly, the high salaried job requires more involvement from the labors and this may reflect negatively in their family life and health. For instance, an employee who withdraws a hefty amount has to work hard for the company, this change in priority may produce a state of the quandary in family life. So high salaried employees must be limited to maintain a social equilibrium. Form the above view, it can be stated that the government can keep certain criteria for salary but a full restriction may lead to chaos.
As a result
of globalization, skilled workers
are welcomed
and paid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
in most of the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Salary
varies depending on job and effort needed. Few suggest that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should control the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
scale and establish a limit for it, while few oppose the view. This essay discusses both views and will draw a conclusion.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
migrate to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
counties in search of a lucrative job, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cooperative business entrepreneurs attract professionals by offering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
and through other fringe benefits.
For example
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
IT
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
are relocating to the US from India in search of better financial support. If an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
is paid
well, he will work
sincerely
and
happily
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
Eventually
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
development and leads to the
overall
development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
In the same way
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who work abroad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
money to their family, this
indeed
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the foreign exchange and economic growth of the parent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
as well
.

On the contrary
, based on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
tax and other obligations
also
will increase, this will invite more chaos.
For example
, based on income all citizens
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay tax and other due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.
Moreover
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "countries'" or "country's"?
countries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is not paid
equally
and discriminations in payment may lead to more perplexities.
Secondly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salaried job requires more involvement from the labors and this may reflect
negatively
in their family life and health.
For instance
, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
who withdraws a hefty amount
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in priority may produce a state of the quandary in family life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salaried
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be limited
to maintain a social equilibrium.

Form the above view, it can
be stated
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
certain criteria for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a full restriction may lead to chaos.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay In many countries in the world, some people can earn extremely high salaries. some people think that this is good for a country. others think that the government should not allow salaries above a certain level. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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