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In many countries, financial crime involving indentity theft is increasing. What are the causes of this trend, and what effect does identity thefts have on the victims involved? v.1

In many countries, financial crime involving indentity theft is increasing. What are the causes of this trend, and what effect does identity thefts have on the victims involved? v. 1
Financial fraud is a major concern in most of the countries. However, identical frauds augment the financial crime, which creates problem for the masses. This essay will not only highlight the problems associated with this issue, but also present effects of it in the enlisted paragraphs. Apparently, the prominent cause of this trend is an online payment servicepayment service. This is because of the invent of the internet, people often used online payment methods for shoppings and bills that makes payment process more convenient. For this reason, individuals, financial details are interlinked with their bank account, which can be hacked by fraudsters. Furthermore, the identity thefts hack the transaction details from the internet. According to the recent survey has been conducted by the Cyber Security Branch of Delhi reveals the cyber crimes increase from 35% to 65% in the last three decades, due to online payment methods. Another specific reason, unsafe internet connection. In other words, people use different websites for their purposes and they fill personal information such as name, address or email ID that creates problem for them. Moreover, theft can easily get information from email, which does not have anti protection for it and this lead a serious issue for individuals. Thus, online payment methods and a unprotected website lead to financial fraud. There are detrimental effects that victims face. First and foremost issue is financial problems. To explain further, sufferers underwent in many financial crisis, which has a negative impact of their life style. Along with this, debts and lone problems arise in their life, which creates conflict in the family. For instance, many people keep their home or car for sales to pay back the loan. Secondly, this crime has a harmful effect on the victim's mind. To explain in detail, people face depression and anxiety because of financial crisis, which leads problem of mental illnesses. Owing to this they sometimes they commit suicide or offences crime such as murder or shoplifting. Hence, suffered face instability in their life and at the same time they face the trauma. In conclusion, identity theft problems are tremendously increasing in many nations. Because of advance technology and corrupted websites, fetch all personal information about the person, and this problem has a colossal impact on the person's lifelife. Therefore, some precautionary steps must take by individuals.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Financial
fraud is a major concern in most of the countries.
However
, identical frauds augment the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, which creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for the masses. This essay will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
highlight the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
associated with this issue,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
present effects of it in the enlisted paragraphs.

Apparently
, the prominent cause of this trend is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
Possible spelling mistake found.
servicepayment
service. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
The word 'invent' is a verb. Did you mean the noun "invention"?
invent
of the internet,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
methods for
Possible spelling mistake found.
shoppings
and bills that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
process more convenient.
For this reason
, individuals,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
are interlinked
with their bank account, which can
be hacked
by fraudsters.
Furthermore
, the identity thefts hack the transaction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
from the internet. According to the recent survey has
been conducted
by the Cyber Security Branch of Delhi reveals the cyber
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
increase from 35% to 65% in the last three decades, due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
methods. Another specific reason, unsafe internet connection.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
websites for their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
purposes and
they fill personal information such as name, address or email ID that creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
for them.
Moreover
, theft can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information from email, which does not have anti protection for it and this lead a serious issue for individuals.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
payment
methods and
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
unprotected website lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
fraud.

There are detrimental effects that victims
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
.
First
and foremost issue is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
further
, sufferers underwent in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
crisis, which has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of their life style. Along with this, debts and lone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
arise in their life, which creates conflict in the family.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their home or car for sales to pay back the loan.
Secondly
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
has a harmful effect on the victim's mind. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
in detail,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
depression and anxiety
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
financial
crisis, which leads
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
of mental illnesses. Owing to this they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they commit suicide or
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
such as murder or shoplifting.
Hence
, suffered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
instability in their life and at the same time they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
face
the trauma.

In conclusion
, identity theft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are
tremendously
increasing in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of advance technology and corrupted websites, fetch all personal information about the person, and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
has a colossal impact on the person's
Possible spelling mistake found.
lifelife
.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
precautionary steps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
take by individuals.
20Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
36Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay In many countries, financial crime involving indentity theft is increasing. What are the causes of this trend, and what effect does identity thefts have on the victims involved? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
387 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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