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In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people consider it valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this? v.17

Adolescents in several nations are involved in some type of paid employment. Some individuals believe that this is absolutely incorrect, whereas, others opine that it provides relevant experience which is vital for learning and absorbing responsibilities. This essay will discuss both aspects and argue why it is wrong to engage children in paid labour. One the one hand, employment at a very young age can have several benefits. The foremost one is that they learn to value money at a young age and spend it wisely which in turn makes them financially secure adults. For children coming from very poor backgrounds, the paid employment could be an opportunity to support their family. On the other hand, there are a few benefits to paid work. Firstly, it demands work hard. What it means, they may lose their education and they might not be educated. Thus, they may face some difficulties in the future. To conclude, having analyzed both sides i believe that government should not engage younger generation to work.
Adolescents in several nations
are involved
in
some
type of
paid
employment.
Some
individuals believe that this is
absolutely
incorrect, whereas, others opine that it provides relevant experience which is vital for learning and absorbing responsibilities. This essay will discuss both aspects and argue why it is
wrong
to engage children in
paid
labour
.

One
the one hand, employment at a
very
young age can have several benefits. The foremost one is that they learn to value money at a young age and spend it
wisely
which in turn
makes
them
financially
secure adults. For children coming from
very
poor backgrounds, the
paid
employment could be an opportunity to support their family.

On the other hand
, there are a few benefits to
paid
work.
Firstly
, it demands work
hard
. What it means, they may lose their
education and
they might not
be educated
.
Thus
, they may face
some
difficulties in the future.
To conclude
, having analyzed both sides
i
believe that
government
should not engage younger generation to work.
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IELTS essay In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
169 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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