Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.2

In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? v. 2
In recent years, the number of people who live in nursing homes in England, Wales and Scotland has been increasing. Some people believe that the family should pay for the care of nursing homes. However, I argue that the government should take responsibility for the cost. The first reason is that some people are too old to pay for the care of other family members and the second reason is that some families cannot afford to pay for the care. The government should pay for the cost of nursing homes because some family members are also too old to pay for the cost of care. Some countries have an aging population due to healthier lifestyles and the advanced state of medical technology. Take Japanese society as an example; it is predicted that one-third of the population in 20 years will be over 65 years. This means that 70 year old people might have to pay for the care of their elderly parents in the future. I therefore believe that taxpayer money should pay for elderly care. The second reason is that the financial situation varies depending on the family. In the case that families cannot afford to pay for the cost, they have to take care of their elderly loved ones. While some people think it is natural to take care of elderly people and they are willing to bath them, feed them and shower them, other people find it very difficult. It is not uncommon that family members use financial, physical, and psychological abuse on their elderly parents because of the stress from taking care of them. For example, there were an increase in the number of cases of euthanasia in countries where this is legal during the recent global economic recession. In conclusion, I strongly agree with the idea that the state should pay for the care of the aged because some family members are too old to pay for them and it might be a heavy burden to take care of them at home. Therefore, the government should establish their pension system for the care of elderly citizens.
In recent years, the number of
people
who
live
in nursing
homes
in England, Wales and Scotland has been increasing.
Some
people
believe that the
family
should
pay
for the
care
of nursing
homes
.
However
, I argue that the
government
should take responsibility for the
cost
. The
first
reason is that
some
people
are too
old
to
pay
for the
care
of other
family
members
and the second reason is that
some
families
cannot afford to
pay
for the care.

The
government
should
pay
for the
cost
of nursing
homes
because
some
family
members
are
also
too
old
to
pay
for the
cost
of
care
.
Some
countries have an aging population due to healthier lifestyles and the advanced state of medical technology. Take Japanese society as an example; it
is predicted
that one-third of the population in 20 years will be over 65 years. This means that 70
year
old
people
might
have to
pay
for the
care
of their
elderly
parents in the future. I
therefore
believe that taxpayer money should
pay
for
elderly
care.

The second reason is that the financial situation varies depending on the
family
. In the case that
families
cannot afford to
pay
for the
cost
, they
have to
take
care
of their
elderly
loved
ones. While
some
people
think
it is natural to take
care
of
elderly
people and
they are willing
to bath
them, feed them and shower them, other
people
find it
very
difficult. It is not uncommon that
family
members
use
financial, physical, and psychological abuse on their
elderly
parents
because
of the
stress
from taking
care
of them.
For example
, there were an increase in the number of cases of euthanasia in countries where this is legal during the recent global economic recession.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
agree
with the
idea
that the state should
pay
for the
care
of the aged
because
some
family
members
are too
old
to
pay
for them and it might be a heavy burden to take
care
of them at home.
Therefore
, the
government
should establish their pension system for the
care
of
elderly
citizens.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
57Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
351 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts