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In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.12

In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? v. 12
There was a time when elders were better adjusted to the joint family structure with extended kin providing care and support. However, nowadays, due to lack of such caring system, taking care of the elderly has become a challenge. To remedy the problem, a relatively new trend is prevailing where elders are moving in their age cohort in old age homes. In Britain, this gives rise to a debate as to who should bear the cost of taking care of the elderly, the government or the family. There are some people who are of the opinion that the government, being responsible for the welfare of its citizens should shoulder the responsibility of elderly care, whereas on the other hand, few believe that burden of elderly care should not be placed on the national exchequer rather families should bear such cost. I am of the view that the families should bear the cost of such care. The first and the foremost reason is the nature of parent child relationship. In my opinion, it is a moral and ethical obligation of children to extend care, support and love to their parents when they reach old age like the way their parents did when the children were young. Moreover, the family would better understand the elderly person and would be in a better position to provide better care rather than relying on an absolute stranger. Elders would be more at ease and feel comfortable among their family members who would be emotionally attached to them and provide care with affection. Secondly, since the cost of elderly care would not be borne by the state, it would save the government a lot of money which can be utilized for some other beneficial purpose, especially in desperate times of economic woes when the government is already resorting to austerity measures. Therefore, considering the aforementioned facts, it would be justified to say that families should pay for the care of their elders.
There was a time when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
adjusted to the joint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
structure with extended kin providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
and support.
However
, nowadays, due to lack of such caring system, taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
has become a challenge. To remedy the problem, a
relatively
new trend is prevailing where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
are moving in their age cohort in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age homes. In Britain, this gives rise to a debate as to who should bear the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of taking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
or the family.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are of the opinion that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, being responsible for the welfare of its citizens should shoulder the responsibility of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
, whereas
on the other hand
, few believe that burden of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
should not
be placed
on the national exchequer
rather
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
should bear such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
. I am of the view that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
should bear the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of such care.

The
first
and the foremost reason is the nature of parent child relationship. In my opinion, it is a moral and ethical obligation of children to extend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
, support and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to their parents when they reach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age like the way their parents did when the children were young.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
understand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
person and would be in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
position to provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
rather
than relying on an absolute stranger.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Elders
would be more at
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
and feel comfortable among their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members who would be
emotionally
attached to them and provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
with affection.

Secondly
, since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
would not
be borne
by the state, it would save the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money which can
be utilized
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other beneficial purpose,
especially
in desperate times of economic woes when the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is already resorting to austerity measures.
Therefore
, considering the aforementioned facts, it would
be justified
to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
should pay for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
38Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes

IELTS essay In Britain, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. Who do you think should pay for this care, the government or the family? v. 12

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
326 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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