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Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the government of richer nation should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such area. v.1

Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the government of richer nation should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such area. v. 1
It is no doubt that the developed countries should come forward to help the third world countries for their improvements in various sectors. In this essay, we will look at the aspects in detail with suitable examples. To begin with, richer nations are generally thinking that the poorness is mostly lying on health, food and also education. However, in reality, those factors are not only causing for the issues. The threats like terrorist attacks, natural calamities, political conditions like so many facts that are relying on them. Therefore, temporary solutions like giving funding for some period to come out of the situation at some time is not a good answer for them. They require a permanent solution for them. For instance, Somalia is one of the poorest country, the richer countries, providing money to help them, however the political people looting the money so the normal people getting suffered. Thus, to get relief from poverty for a while, they attack and raid the things on ships on their way. Secondly, the poor countries were becoming a colonial country once upon a time. Therefore, the kind of the unfair situation existing since the period. A strong statesmanship needed for them to remove such kind of ignorance. The richer nations may not be interfered on their political matters. However, they should guide the peoples representatives to rule the country in a healthy way and encourage more trading with them and also practical ideas for their developments. Consequently, the people live with a better life. To conclude, they need assistance obviously. The richer countries analyse their facts and should give permanent solutions for their improvements on continual basis, otherwise they will still suffer with their existing issues.
It is no doubt that the developed
countries
should
come
forward to
help
the third world
countries
for their improvements in various sectors. In this essay, we will look at the aspects in detail with suitable examples.

To
begin
with,
richer
nations are
generally
thinking that the poorness is
mostly
lying on health, food and
also
education.
However
, in reality, those factors are not
only
causing for the issues. The threats like terrorist attacks, natural calamities, political conditions like
so
many
facts that are relying on them.
Therefore
, temporary solutions like giving funding for
some
period to
come
out of the situation at
some
time is not a
good
answer for them. They require a permanent solution for them.
For instance
, Somalia is one of the poorest
country
, the
richer
countries
, providing money to
help
them,
however
the political
people
looting the money
so
the normal
people
getting suffered.
Thus
, to
get
relief from poverty for a while, they attack and raid the things on ships on their way.

Secondly
, the poor
countries
were becoming a colonial
country
once upon a time.
Therefore
, the kind of the unfair situation existing since the period. A strong statesmanship needed for them to remove such kind of ignorance. The
richer
nations may not
be interfered
on their political matters.
However
, they should guide the
peoples
representatives to
rule
the
country
in a healthy way
and encourage more trading with them and
also
practical
ideas
for their developments.
Consequently
, the
people
live
with a better life.

To conclude
, they need assistance
obviously
. The
richer
countries
analyse
their facts and should give permanent solutions for their improvements on continual basis,
otherwise
they will
still
suffer with their existing issues.
20Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Improvement in health, education and trade are essential for the development of poorer nations. However, the government of richer nation should take more responsibility for helping the poorer nations in such area. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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