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Imagine that you are a student at a university where there are long breaks between semesters. The university requires all students to do one of the following for one month during the break. - Students must take a course which has no direct connection to t v.1

Imagine that you are a student at a university where there are long breaks between semesters. The university requires all students to do one of the following for one month during the break. - Students must take a course which has no direct connection to t v. 1
No one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that time is gold, and people should use their time efficiently. There are many options for using the time which is related to the people’s priority. In this regard, universities provided some programs for the student to prosper students’ abilities. Not all people concur when this issue arises. To being cognizant to the logic behind those who endorse or repudiate the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that Doing some part-time jobs in hometowns for making better some facets of lifestyle in these cities are more profitable than taking some irrelevant courses in the universities in the breaks. Among a plentitude of reasons in support of this assertion, acquiring a lot of experiences and having the contribution in the society could be picked out for further analysis. To commence with, a consensus has yet to be reached; however, regarding the importance of the experience in the modern world with its galloping rate as a stepping –stone for future, based upon the statistics of different general questionnaires in sundry countries, people are unanimous about the conviction that students should put their knowledge into the practice by attending to some part-time jobs related to their majors. It helps them to obtain valuable experiences which could be combined with their educations, and cover the way toward the success. To elucidate on, educated people with high experiences and broaden horizons are flourished very easily in the society and they will occupy the prestigious job positions in the near future. For instance, I worked for an organization as the part-time job and I was very eager and successful in this work. This ability enhanced my chance for finding a good job in the big and prosperous company with high earning in future. In addition to the reason raised above; doing some positive change in the societies by young persons could also substantiate the justifiability of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief. each member of a society is willing to contribute in the people’s life and they try to do some thing based on their abilities and situations. To delineate, students are not separated from this issue and it improves their self-confidence and penchant for working better. Thus, this reason stimulates them to make some alteration and attempt to make the situation better. A vivid example can be given to shed light on what was elaborated above. The results of a study carried out by Rice University’s sociology graduate students unveiled the fact that the collaborating young people with other memers of societies in the critical situation improve the performance of the infrastructure projects and they achieve better results. Drawing up the reasons, discreetly put, as far as my personal perspective on the topic is concerned, I reiterate that participating in some projects of the university for improving the people’s life has been shown better results for students in comparing attending to some classes about the irrelevant major in their leisure times. It provides for them the situations for not only obtaining many experiences but also having the role in improving people’s life.
No one can cast a shadow of doubt on the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is gold, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
efficiently
. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
options for using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
which
is related
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
priority. In this regard,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
provided
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
programs for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to prosper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
abilities. Not all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
concur when this issue arises. To being cognizant to the logic behind those who endorse or repudiate the legitimacy of this contention, not having any biased perception, I presume that Doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in hometowns for making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
facets of lifestyle in these cities are more profitable than taking
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
irrelevant courses in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
in the breaks. Among a
Possible spelling mistake found.
plentitude
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
in support of this assertion, acquiring
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
and having the contribution in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
could
be picked
out for
further
analysis.

To commence with, a consensus has
yet
to
be reached
;
however
, regarding the importance of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experience
in the modern world with its galloping rate as a stepping –stone for future, based upon the statistics of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
general questionnaires in sundry countries,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are unanimous about the conviction that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should put their knowledge into the practice by attending to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
related to their majors. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to obtain valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
which could
be combined
with their educations, and cover the way toward the success. To elucidate on, educated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
and broaden horizons
are flourished
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
easily
in the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
society and
they will occupy the prestigious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
positions in the near future.
For instance
, I worked for an organization as the part-time
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
job and
I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
eager and successful in this work. This ability enhanced my chance for finding a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
and prosperous
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
with high earning
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
.

In addition
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
raised above; doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
by young persons could
also
substantiate the
Possible spelling mistake found.
justifiability
of the claim made at the outset of this essay. In conjunction with public belief.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
each
member of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is willing to contribute in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
life and
they try to do
Did you mean "something"?
some thing
based on their abilities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
. To delineate,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are not separated from this issue and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
their self-confidence and penchant for working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
.
Thus
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
stimulates them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
alteration and attempt to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
. A vivid example can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to shed light on what
was elaborated
above. The results of a study carried out by Rice
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
University’s
sociology graduate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
unveiled the fact that the collaborating young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with other
Possible spelling mistake found.
memers
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
societies
in the critical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the performance of the infrastructure
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
projects and
they achieve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
results.

Drawing up the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
,
discreetly
put, as far as my personal perspective on the topic
is concerned
, I reiterate that participating in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
projects of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
for improving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life has
been shown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
results for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in comparing attending to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
classes about the irrelevant major in their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
. It provides for them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
situations
for not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
obtaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
experiences
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
having the role in improving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
life.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
51Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes
Language is to the mind more than light is to the eye.
William Gibson

IELTS essay Imagine that you are a student at a university where there are long breaks between semesters. The university requires all students to do one of the following for one month during the break. - Students must take a course which has no direct connection to t v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
531 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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