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How do movies or TV influence people’s behavior? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v.2

How do movies or TV influence people’s behavior? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v. 2
People found communicating a fundamental and principal need from the early ages of humans’ creation. This requirement has been especially improved by variety of medias invented during time. One the important and popular arts and technologies existed in recent decades are movies and other graphical medias. Experts believe that these products can have influence in our everyday life. Similarly, I think that this idea could be true since it may affects our relationships emotionally, socially and globally. Emotionally, movies, TV series and other mass media productions can change our feelings about something, because they picture different people with different characters experience in numerous occasions where any of these events can trigger our memory about a similar incident happened to us if they were performed well by right cast and direction. Furthermore, we may take a lesson from them and totally ratify any of our emotional behaviors. For example, I always think about myself first rather than anyone else in my whole life. But, when I watched a beautiful movie about a mother’s last days with his son where his mom was going to die due to her sever illness, I was shocked and I just felt in that very moment that what I have done to my family and close relatives in past years. They were not my priority in any case regretfully. So these things can change you in a good way hopefully. Socially, movies and media feeds give fresh information to their readers and followers. In the past, a letter or big events news might be delivered to other side of the country after weeks or even months, since the media coverage was weak during those days. However, social media and specifically movies and graphical arts which are followed by many of people easily transfer any news or even social messages anywhere in less than a blink. Movies can raise a nation to defend their goals or give them enough courage to almost change anything if the movies stimulate the right spot in any social community. Globally, movies can help different people from different countries know each other. Generally, movies are the first cultural products of any state which can present their beliefs in every part of this world without any serious infrastructure. It can inspire people to do an action to save the world. In conclusion, movies and other motion picture products have the ability to alter everything if they show the main demands of their contributers. I think that movies effect on our behavior is so crucial since it may influence our decisions in different parts and levels of our life relations.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
found communicating a fundamental and principal need from the early ages of humans’ creation. This requirement has been
especially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
by variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medias
invented during time. One the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and popular arts and technologies existed in recent decades are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
graphical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medias
. Experts believe that these products can have influence in our everyday life.
Similarly
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
could be true since it may
The verb 'may' requires the base form of the verb: "affect"
affects
our relationships
emotionally
,
socially
and globally.

Emotionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
, TV series and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
mass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
productions can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
our feelings about something,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they picture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
characters experience in numerous occasions where any of these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
can trigger our memory about a similar incident happened to us if they
were performed
well by right cast and direction.
Furthermore
, we may take a lesson from them and
totally
ratify any of our emotional behaviors.
For example
, I always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about myself
first
rather
than anyone else in my whole life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, when I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
about a mother’s last days with his son where his mom was going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
due to her sever illness, I
was shocked
and I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
felt in that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
moment that what I have done to my family and close relatives in past years. They were not my priority in any case
regretfully
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
these things can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
you in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way
hopefully
.

Socially
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
feeds give fresh information to their readers and followers. In the past, a letter or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "events'" or "event's"?
events
news might
be delivered
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side of the country after weeks or even months, since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
coverage was weak during those days.
However
, social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and
specifically
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and graphical arts which
are followed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
transfer any news or even social messages anywhere in less than a blink.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Movies
can raise a nation to defend their goals or give them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
courage to almost
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
anything if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
stimulate the right spot in any social community.

Globally,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
countries know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Generally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
are the
first
cultural products of any state which can present their beliefs in every part of this world without any serious infrastructure. It can inspire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to do an action to save the world.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
motion picture products have the ability to alter everything if they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the main demands of their
Possible spelling mistake found.
contributers
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
effect on our behavior is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
crucial since it may influence our decisions in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
parts and levels of our life relations.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay How do movies or TV influence people’s behavior? Use reasons and specific examples to support your answer. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
436 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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