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Hosting sporting events such as the Olympics and the World Cup can bring benefits to the host countries. How far do you agree with this statement? Use your own examples to support. v.2

Hosting sporting events such as the Olympics and the World Cup can bring benefits to the host countries. How far Use your own examples to support. v. 2
Some people believe that the Olympics can bring benefits to the host countries, while others hold the view that there is no relationship between the Olympics and the benefit of the host country. In my opinion, the Olympics do have an influence on neighbouring countries due to social and psychological reasons. First and foremost, the social reason is why I think the Olympics has an influence on neighbouring countries. Although potentially negative impacts of events must be taken into account, I still reckon that the organizing the sports event has in many ways enormously enriched people's lives. For example, a well-known American philosopher once said, sports events can bring the two nations close and eliminate the culture distance. ' It is thus clearly shown that human behaviour is changed by psychological law. In addition, another factor that should be considered as a relationship and friendship reason. As far as society is concerned, the ultimate aim of the Olympics is to build a peaceful and better world. For instance, a recent article published by The Economist reveals that 80% of people played different kinds of sports and love to watch the Olympics on television. Undoubtedly, this is a clear indication that the Olympics and the World Cup have a positive impact on host countries. In conclusion, I hold the view that the Olympics and the World Cup are extremely grateful. To address this issue, the government and society should make a concerted effort to arrange such events.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the Olympics can bring benefits to the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, while others hold the view that there is no relationship between the Olympics and the benefit of the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In my opinion, the Olympics do have an influence on
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbouring' is British English.
neighbouring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
due to social and psychological reasons.

First
and foremost, the social reason is why I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the Olympics has an influence on
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbouring' is British English.
neighbouring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. Although
potentially
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be taken
into account, I
still
reckon that the organizing the sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
has in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways
enormously
enriched
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
For example
, a well-known American philosopher once said, sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
can bring the two nations close and eliminate the culture distance. ' It is
thus
clearly
shown that human
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
by psychological law.

In addition
, another factor that should
be considered
as a relationship and friendship reason. As far as society
is concerned
, the ultimate aim of the Olympics is to build a peaceful and better world.
For instance
, a recent article published by The Economist reveals that 80% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
played
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of sports and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the Olympics on television.
Undoubtedly
, this is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
indication that the Olympics and the World Cup have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impact on host countries.

In conclusion
, I hold the view that the Olympics and the World Cup are
extremely
grateful. To address this issue, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and society should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a concerted effort to arrange such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Hosting sporting events such as the Olympics and the World Cup can bring benefits to the host countries. How far Use your own examples to support. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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