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Historical monuments and museums are visited only by the tourists, locals do not visit them. Why is this is happening? What are the solutions to prevent this? v.2

Historical monuments and museums are visited only by the tourists, locals do not visit them. Why is this is happening? What are the solutions to prevent this? v. 2
Places of traditional significance and museums, while often visited by the foreign travellers, fail to attract the local communities, which is because of the lack of appreciation and acknowledgement of the local culture, among the native population. It can be remedied by increasing publicity activities, to make the people more aware. We will discuss this further, in the essay. Most people are not completely aware of their cultural heritage and hence, do not possess a good understanding of their ancestral lineage. In other words, it causes a nonchalant attitude among the local people, when it comes to places of historical importance. For example, a recent study by the American Psychiatrists' Association, (APA), claimed that more people were likely to visit a museum in a foreign land, rather than the one in their locality. Therefore, it is illustrative of how local communities lack a real understanding and appreciation of their culture. One possible way to tackle the problem would be to increase publicity activities, to garner local attention. Specific information about the sites can be spread through flyers, mass media, and via the internet. Moreover, increasing awareness and educating the population by such approaches will attract the native crowd. For instance, a museum in India, recorded a two-fifth rise in the visits by the local population, following several publicity activities. Besides, another possible solution would be to invest more in reconstruction and renovation strategies, by channelling more funds towards the cause by government bodies. In conclusion, sites of historical significance are visited less by the locals because of a lack of appreciation and understanding of the local culture, which can be combatted by more publicities and sufficient government funding. With these suggested measures, there will be an increasing percentage of local people visiting museums and historical sites, in the future.
Places of traditional significance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
, while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
visited by the foreign
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
, fail to attract the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities, which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the lack of appreciation and
Possible spelling mistake. 'acknowledgement' is British English.
acknowledgement
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
culture, among the native population. It can
be remedied
by increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
publicity
activities, to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
more aware. We will discuss this
further
, in the essay.

Most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are not completely aware of their cultural heritage and
hence
, do not possess a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
understanding of their ancestral lineage.
In other words
, it causes a nonchalant attitude among the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to places of historical importance.
For example
, a recent study by the American Psychiatrists' Association, (APA), claimed that more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were likely to visit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in a foreign land,
rather
than the one in their locality.
Therefore
, it is illustrative of how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
communities lack a real understanding and appreciation of their culture.

One possible way to tackle the problem would be to increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
publicity
activities, to garner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
attention. Specific information about the sites can
be spread
through flyers, mass media, and via the internet.
Moreover
, increasing awareness and educating the population by such approaches will attract the native crowd.
For instance
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in India, recorded a two-fifth rise in the visits by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
population, following several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
publicity
activities.
Besides
, another possible solution would be to invest more in reconstruction and renovation strategies, by channelling more funds towards the cause by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
bodies.

In conclusion
, sites of historical significance
are visited
less by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of a lack of appreciation and understanding of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
culture, which can be
Possible spelling mistake found.
combatted
by more
Possible spelling mistake found.
publicities
and sufficient
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
funding. With these suggested measures, there will be an increasing percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
visiting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museums
and historical sites, in the future.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Mistakes

IELTS essay Historical monuments and museums are visited only by the tourists, locals do not visit them. Why is this is happening? What are the solutions to prevent this? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
9
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 9.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 9.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 9.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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