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Governments should make more effort to promote alternative sources of energy. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? v.4

Governments should make more effort to promote alternative sources of energy. with this opinion? v. 4
Human always uses different kind of energies. For many years, People have used wood to make fire. After human found about coal, this stone becomes the primary source of energy. When people discovered fossil oil, coal replaced with these new sources. All of these sources have some limitations. First, we do not have enough sources of theme. In the world, a few countries have these sources such as the Middle East countries. Secondly, these sources are underground. We must spend a lot of money to achieve them. In addition, after we get them, we have to convert them to become useful. These processes do not easy at all. Finally, fossil oil is danger of climate. Pollution that we have now is resulting of using fossil oil. In my opinion, government must try to find new sources of energy. Today we have new sources. For example, we try to use the energy of the sun, or water even wind. All these nature energies are clean and do not harmful at all. However, these sources do, not enough for all purposes. We cannot use of them in factories or in cars. Moreover, the next generation of us also will need fossil oil. We should not use all of them. May be nuclear energy is good replacement for fossil oil, but it is dangerous. This source is more dangerous than another source of energy. We remember events such as Hiroshima. To conclude, both the government and people must try to reduce the use of harmful source energy. The government should allocate more budgets on the researcher to find the new source of energy.
Human always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energies
. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
wood to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
fire. After human found about coal, this stone becomes the primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
discovered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
, coal replaced with these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
. All of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
limitations.

First
, we do not have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of theme. In the world, a few countries have these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
such as the Middle East countries.
Secondly
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
are underground. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
money to achieve them.
In addition
, after we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
them, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
convert them to become useful. These processes do not easy at all.
Finally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of climate. Pollution that we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
is resulting of using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
oil.

In my opinion,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
try to find
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
we have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
.
For example
, we try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
of the sun, or water even wind. All these nature
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energies
are clean and do not harmful at all.
However
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
do, not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for all purposes. We cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of them in factories or in cars.
Moreover
, the
next
generation of us
also
will need
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
. We should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
all of them. May be nuclear
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
replacement for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
than another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
. We remember
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
such as Hiroshima.

To conclude
, both the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of harmful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should allocate more budgets on the researcher to find the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Governments should make more effort to promote alternative sources of energy. with this opinion? v. 4

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
270 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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