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Governments and big companies should work together to reverse environmental damage, rather than expecting individuals to take responsibility. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your opinion and relevant examples. v.3

Governments and big companies should work together to reverse environmental damage, rather than expecting individuals to take responsibility. with this statement? Give your opinion and relevant examples. v. 3
In the contemporary era, there is a heated argument over the issue that, the governments and large industries solve environmental issues, and not on individuals. A lion's share of the society favours it, However, the rest goes adverse it. I do not quite agree with this view. In my opinion, everyone has the responsibility to contribute their bit to reverse environmental damage. Governments can help solve environmental issues by enacting strict laws that prevent deforestation and illegal mining. For example, illegal sand mining has destroyed many rivers in Bangladesh. Strict laws are needed to prevent this practice. Likewise, the clearing of forest land for building industries and residential spaces should be stopped by stringent laws. In addition, the government should support the use of renewable sources of energy like solar and wind. It can incentivize companies conducting research in this field and offer subsidies to encourage people to install solar panels on their rooftops. Industries are the biggest polluters and as such they have a greater role than anyone else to reverse at least some of the damage caused by them. They can do this by investing in eco-friendly technologies. For instance, manufacturing companies must ensure that they do not dump untreated waste into water bodies, they must limit the use of plastic for packaging. Furthermore, Individuals like you and me have to contribute our bit too. We can do this by adopting responsible consumption. We must resist the temptation to buy products we do not need. If everyone practices, thoughtful consumption of the available resources, we can prevent further hardship to the environment. In conclusion, environmental issues cannot be solved by any particular person or authority. Collective efforts of individuals, companies and governments are required to arrest the devastation caused to the environment.
In the contemporary era, there is a heated argument over the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
that, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and large industries solve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, and not on individuals. A lion's share of the society
Possible spelling mistake. 'favours' is British English.
favours
it,
However
, the rest goes adverse it. I do not quite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view. In my opinion, everyone has the responsibility to contribute their bit to reverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
damage.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Governments
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
solve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
by enacting strict laws that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
deforestation and illegal mining.
For example
, illegal sand mining has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rivers in Bangladesh. Strict laws
are needed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
this practice.
Likewise
, the clearing of forest land for building industries and residential spaces should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stopped
by stringent laws.
In addition
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should support the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of renewable sources of energy like solar and wind. It can incentivize
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
conducting research in this field and offer subsidies to encourage
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to install solar panels on their rooftops.

Industries are the biggest polluters and as such they have a greater role than anyone else to reverse at least
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
damage caused by them. They can do this by investing in eco-friendly technologies.
For instance
, manufacturing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
ensure that they do not dump untreated waste into water bodies, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
limit the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of plastic for packaging.
Furthermore
, Individuals like you and me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
contribute our bit too. We can do this by adopting responsible consumption. We
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
resist the temptation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
products we do not need. If everyone practices, thoughtful consumption of the available resources, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
further
hardship to the environment.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
cannot
be solved
by any particular person or authority. Collective efforts of individuals,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
are required
to arrest the devastation caused to the environment.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Governments and big companies should work together to reverse environmental damage, rather than expecting individuals to take responsibility. with this statement? Give your opinion and relevant examples. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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