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Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. do you agree or disagree? v.1

Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. v. 1
In this globalized eon, without any qualms, it is accepted that Government funding should be used to resolve the basic needs of the local residents like housing and proper road structure. Some people concede that, it should be used for the renovation of ancient buildings. However, I debunk from them and proffer that basic facilities should be prioritized before the luxuries. Compelling evidence is obtained to demonstrate the notion of how the importance of housing and proper roadway in a city. The paramount concrete reason is good housing is a reflection of a healthy society. To go hand in hand, a supernal rationale which drags me to persist is Well-maintained highway help to have a good transportation in the city. To uphold my article of faith, I would jot down an illustration of the increase in population result in people stuck in high-rise buildings and skyscrapers. What is half full for some, may appear half empty to others, so the public across the board discriminate that ancient buildings are needed to be preserved by funding them in a huge sum, which has a myriad of reasons. To commence with, some people reckon that old buildings are reflections of our culture and heritage, so it needs to be preserved. Withal they also justify that revamped building will increase our economy in the form of tourism. To synopsis, I pen down saying that there are innumerable robust factors underpinning the fact that spending on the needs of residents is particularly important. Ergo, its contrary can be overlooked or curbed. Consequently, I firmly agree with the aforementioned statement.
In this globalized eon, without any qualms, it is
accepted
that
Government
funding should be
used
to resolve the basic needs of the local residents like housing and proper road structure.
Some
people
concede that, it should be
used
for the renovation of ancient
buildings
.
However
, I debunk from them and proffer that basic facilities should
be prioritized
before
the luxuries.

Compelling evidence
is obtained
to demonstrate the notion of how the importance of housing and proper roadway in a city. The paramount concrete reason is
good
housing is a reflection of a healthy society. To go hand in hand, a supernal rationale which drags me to persist is Well-maintained highway
help
to have a
good
transportation in the city. To uphold my article of faith, I would jot down an illustration of the increase in population result in
people
stuck in high-rise
buildings
and skyscrapers.

What is half full for
some
, may appear half empty to others,
so
the public across the board discriminate that ancient
buildings
are needed
to
be preserved
by funding them in a huge sum, which has a myriad of reasons. To commence with,
some
people
reckon that
old
buildings
are reflections of our culture and heritage,
so
it needs to
be preserved
. Withal they
also
justify that revamped
building
will increase our economy in the form of tourism.

To synopsis, I pen down saying that there are innumerable robust factors underpinning the fact that spending on the needs of residents is
particularly
important
. Ergo, its contrary can
be overlooked
or curbed.
Consequently
, I
firmly
agree
with the aforementioned statement.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
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Chinese Proverb

IELTS essay Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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