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Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped. Instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped. Instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. v. 1
Each country's ministry develops their country with the help of tax money from the public and tries to achieve more popular than the competitive country. In such development, the government started to invest in reconstruct of an ancient building. I agree that the authority should change its focus from remodelling their old building to develop the new buildings and the long road. On the one hand, the government thinks that re-building of their country's old houses will gain a better name in the world market and it will attract more tourists to the place. This will generate more income for the government from foreign countries. Moreover, the state's culture and tradition will be reflected in their ancient building and it is useful for the future generation to know the past life of their hometown. On the other hand, the country should develop its places with more modernist and better infrastructure to hold a position in this competition between countries. The country's standard will be decided on the way the state design their building and road with luxurious and elegant. This scenario will make a decision that the country is developed or developing or undeveloped. In addition, depends upon this factor, the country's currency value will be fixed. For example, the automobile from other countries will come as a trader to invest in a particular country only when they have all the facilities for them. This will increase that particular nation's GDA (Gross domestic product) and can become first among the competitor. To conclude, the nation's authority should decide which investment will make the country to develop into the next step among other countries. By making investments in building new houses and road, instead of reconstructing of old houses, have greater development in this competitive market.
Each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
ministry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develops
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
of tax money from the public and tries to achieve more popular than the competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. In such development, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to invest in reconstruct of an ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the authority should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
its focus from
Possible spelling mistake. 'remodelling' is British English.
remodelling
their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
the new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buildings
and the long road.

On the one hand, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
that re-building of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
will gain a better name in the world market and it will attract more tourists to the place. This will generate more income for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
from foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
Moreover
, the state's culture and tradition will
be reflected
in their ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
and it is useful for the future generation to know the past life of their hometown.

On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
its places with more modernist and better infrastructure to hold a position in this competition between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
standard will
be decided
on the way the state design their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
and road with luxurious and elegant. This scenario will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a decision that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is developed
or developing or undeveloped.
In addition
, depends upon this factor, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country's
currency value will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
.
For example
, the automobile from other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
as a trader to invest in a particular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when they have all the facilities for them. This will increase that particular nation's
Possible spelling mistake found.
GDA
(Gross domestic product) and can become
first
among the competitor.

To conclude
, the nation's authority should decide which investment will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
develop
into the
next
step among other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
. By making investments in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and road,
instead
of reconstructing of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
, have greater development in this competitive market.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Government spending on restoration of old buildings in cities should be stopped. Instead they should spend the money for housing and road development. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
295 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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