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Government should spend more money on railways than roads. To what extend do you agree or disagree. v.2

Government should spend more money on railways than roads. v. 2
Due to the advancement in technology the mode of reading has also changed. These days, a high number of people are deciding on reading electronic books rather than printed books. Although there are still drawbacks of e-books reading, in my view, the benefits are more significant. On the one hand, the downsides of reading electronic books exists. To begin with, it is detrimental for the readers’ eyesight. An avid reader may receive damaging effects on their vision due to the rays produced from reading materials on smartphones and computer screens. A recent study, for example, has shown that weak eyesight problem among youngsters is 50% owing to reading the e-books. Furthermore, reading books on gadgets does not give a sense of feeling of studying, which can only be perceived through reading a printed form of books. This is because we cannot touch the electronic books and feel its paper. On the other hand, I believe the positive outcomes of reading e-books would eclipse its negative outcomes. Firstly, electronic books require very less space to store them. Millions of e-books can be safe and store in a minimum memory of smartphones, laptops and tablets, which would require at least a building if they are in the printed form. This, in turn, gives readers a facility to carry a plethora of books with themselves wherever they move. Secondly, books in soft form are free or sometime very economical. Many e-books are available online in different books related website for free, but very few are only available in the paid version, which are also not expensive. For instance, “The Advanced Concepts of Software Engineering” written by James Bolt can be downloaded for free online, which if intended to purchase in printed form costs $200. In conclusion, while reading e-books rather than printed books has drawbacks such as eyesight issue and no sense of reading, in my opinion, the benefits such as requiring less pace and economical aspect are more notable.
Due to the advancement in technology the mode of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
has
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
. These days, a high number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are deciding on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. Although there are
still
drawbacks of e-books
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
, in my view, the benefits are more significant.

On the one hand, the downsides of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
exists. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is detrimental for the readers’ eyesight. An avid reader may receive damaging effects on their vision due to the rays produced from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
materials on smartphones and computer screens. A recent study,
for example
, has shown that weak eyesight problem among youngsters is 50% owing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
the e-books.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
on gadgets does not give a sense of feeling of studying, which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
be perceived
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
form
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
we cannot touch the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
and feel its paper.

On the other hand
, I believe the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcomes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
e-books would eclipse its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
outcomes.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
electronic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less space to store them. Millions of e-books can be safe and store in a minimum memory of smartphones, laptops and tablets, which would require at least a building if they are in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
form
. This, in turn, gives readers a facility to carry a plethora of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
with themselves wherever they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
in soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
form
are free or sometime
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
economical.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
e-books are available online in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
related website for free,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
available in the paid version, which are
also
not expensive.
For instance
, “The Advanced Concepts of Software Engineering” written by James Bolt can
be downloaded
for free online, which
Did you mean "is"?
if
intended to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
form
costs $200.

In conclusion
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
e-books
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
printed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
has drawbacks such as eyesight issue and no sense of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
, in my opinion, the benefits such as requiring less pace and economical aspect are more notable.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Government should spend more money on railways than roads. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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