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Government should put tax on unhealthy food to promote better health. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Government should put tax on unhealthy food to promote better health. v. 1
Since recent times are witnessing a considerable consumption of junk food, it is a matter of grave concern that healthy food could be promoted by imposing higher governmental taxes on fast food. I agree with the above statement owing to various reasons. To begin with, higher taxes imposed on junk food would reduce its consumption. The people would therefore, be subject to cook and eat the healthy food at home. The middle and below- middle class people who cannot afford expensive unhealthy food would reduce purchasing of it. They would consume it on only special occasions such as ceremonies, parties and festivals. This can be exemplified by a research that the sales of junk food four times greater in festival seasons rather than ordinary days. Thus, higher taxes are helpful in reducing the consumption of unhealthy food items. In addition, the money collected from junk food taxes could be used to promote the healthy food and to aware people about harmful consequences of unhealthy food. In order that, tax money should be used to make healthy food more easily available at reasonable prices which would encourage people to eat healthy food. Moreover, debates, publications and seminars could be organised by government to aware people about detrimental effects such as high blood pressure, obesity and other health hazards. As a result, people would depart themselves from junk food items. To conclude, although it is difficult to stop people from consuming junk food completely but given the affordmation views, it is apparent that the higher taxes on junk food may reduce its consumption to a significant level and encourage people to take healthy food.
Since recent times are witnessing a considerable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, it is a matter of grave concern that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
could
be promoted
by imposing higher governmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the above statement owing to various reasons.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
imposed on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
therefore
, be subject to cook and eat the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
at home. The middle and below- middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who cannot afford expensive unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
purchasing of it. They would consume it on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
special occasions such as ceremonies, parties and festivals. This can
be exemplified
by
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
that the sales of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
four times greater in festival seasons
rather
than ordinary days.
Thus
, higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
are helpful in reducing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
of unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items.

In addition
, the money collected from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to promote the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
and to aware
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about harmful consequences of unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
. In order that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
money should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
more
easily
available at reasonable prices which would encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to eat
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
Moreover
, debates, publications and seminars could be
Possible spelling mistake. 'organised' is British English.
organised
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
to aware
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
about detrimental effects such as high blood pressure, obesity and other health hazards.
As a result
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would depart themselves from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
items.

To conclude
, although it is difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from consuming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the
Possible spelling mistake found.
affordmation
views, it is apparent that the higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
to a significant level and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
48Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
The conquest of learning is achieved through the knowledge of languages.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Government should put tax on unhealthy food to promote better health. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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