Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

For the students (ages 5-10), It is better to take a break for every one hour of instruction or let them to focus on lessons for a long period of time? v.1

For the students (ages 5-10), It is better to take a break for every one hour of instruction or let them to focus on lessons for a long period of time? v. 1
It is often thought that we live in a period where there is a huge use of disposable products. In the next paragraphs, I will discuss the reason and what effects it can have in a longer term of period. First of all, one of the first problems of this issue is that it is time saving and easier. The reason for this is that there will be no dishes that need to be cleaned after having a meal. Furthermore, it is also saving water, which will make a decline in the water bills. For example, those products can be uncomplicated when bringing nutriments to your employment. Moreover, there is also less time at the break time to use for washing dishes. So that's, it is more preferable to make use of those goods. In contrast, a possible effect of this problem would be that it can have a negative effect on our entire environment. This is because a lot of inhabitants are throwing their products on the floor, which can cause pollution. For instance, it can be seen by a lot of youngsters who are throwing their empty tiffins on the floor, while being unaware of the negative effects on the nature. All in all, this impurity can be really dangerous for the living species on our planet. To conclude, these days a lot of people are using products for a short time of period. However, the main cause for this is that it is a lot easier and time saving to make use of those plates and tiffins. Although, this effect can be negative for the future life and the nature.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a period where there is a huge
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of disposable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. In the
next
paragraphs, I will discuss the reason and what effects it can have in a longer term of period.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, one of the
first
problems of this issue is that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
saving and easier.
The reason for this is
that there will be no dishes that need to
be cleaned
after having a meal.
Furthermore
, it is
also
saving water, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a decline in the water bills.
For example
, those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
can
be uncomplicated
when bringing nutriments to your employment.
Moreover
, there is
also
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at the break
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
for washing dishes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that's, it is more preferable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
.

In contrast
, a possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
of this problem would be that it can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
on our entire environment. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of inhabitants are throwing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
on the floor, which can cause pollution.
For instance
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of youngsters who are throwing their empty
Possible spelling mistake found.
tiffins
on the floor, while being unaware of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects on the nature. All in all, this impurity can be
really
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
for the living species on our planet.

To conclude
, these days a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
for a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of period.
However
, the main cause for this is that it is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
easier and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
saving to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of those plates and
Possible spelling mistake found.
tiffins
. Although, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effect
can be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
for the future life and the nature.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay For the students (ages 5-10), It is better to take a break for every one hour of instruction or let them to focus on lessons for a long period of time? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts