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Describe a game or sport you enjoy playing. You should say: what kind of sport it is? Who you play it with? Where you play it? And explain why you enjoy playing it v.2

Describe a game or sport you enjoy playing. You should say: what kind of sport it is? Who you play it with? Where you play it? And explain why you enjoy playing it v. 2
Going to university for higher education after high school is becoming increasingly popular. Many students are now inclined to join university immediately after they finish the high school instead of working. This essay will discuss the benefits as well as drawbacks of this ongoing trend. Planning higher studies after high institution has many benefits. Applying immediately for academy courses, after hall, keep students focused and more study oriented than those who start working after seminary and then resume their studies later. Recent studies conducted by academy have shown that students who register for educational institution courses after academy has higher chances of good academic scores. Joining a course and finishing it with good grades open doors to opportunities. Students get good salary jobs in their respective domain at an early stage of life compare to others and lead a direct path to success. The article published by Newsdaily has proved that people who has finished their studies in early ages and started working has higher success rates. Therefore, completing studies early has many benefits. This ongoing trend also has some disadvantages. Firstly, people will not have local working experience which is very important to understand the job market. If you know how things are being managed in the market, you will get one step closer to the success. According to a paper published last week, students who work and gain local experience first are more successful in jobs like marketing and sales which requires knowledge of culture and market. Secondly, work experience gives a new point of view to see the world. One can truly understand their interests which help to decide the field of study. For example, if you will work with sales team first before actually pursuing degree in sales, you will have a better idea that are you content with sales job or not. Hence, working before choosing the field of study has its own benefits. This essay discussed advantages as well as drawbacks of pursuing a university course immediately after school after working after school. In fact, students should consider both sides and choose wisely.
Going to university for higher education after high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is becoming
increasingly
popular.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
inclined to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
university immediately after they finish the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
. This essay will discuss the benefits
as well
as drawbacks of this ongoing trend.

Planning higher
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
after high institution has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits. Applying immediately for academy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
, after hall,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
focused and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
oriented than those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
after seminary and then resume their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
later. Recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
conducted by academy have shown that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
register for educational institution
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
courses
after academy has higher chances of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
academic scores. Joining a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
and finishing it with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
grades open doors to opportunities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in their respective domain at an early stage of life compare to others and lead a direct path to success. The article published by
Possible spelling mistake found.
Newsdaily
has proved that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
Did you mean "have", "haven"? Alternatively, check whether the singular of 'people' should be used.
has
finished their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
in early ages and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
has higher success rates.
Therefore
, completing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
studies
early has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits.

This ongoing trend
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will not have local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
experience which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to understand the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
market. If you know how things are
being managed
in the market, you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
one step closer to the success. According to a paper published last week,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
work and gain local experience
first
are more successful in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
like marketing and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
which requires knowledge of culture and market.
Secondly
, work experience gives a new point of view to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
the world. One can
truly
understand their interests which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to decide the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
.
For example
, if you will work with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
team
first
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
actually pursuing degree in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
, you will have a better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that are you content with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sales
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
or not.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
choosing the field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
has its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits.

This essay discussed advantages
as well
as drawbacks of pursuing a university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
immediately after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
. In fact,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should consider both sides and choose
wisely
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Describe a game or sport you enjoy playing. You should say: what kind of sport it is? Who you play it with? Where you play it? And explain why you enjoy playing it v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
349 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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