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For centuries important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing, and math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills should be made as a fourth skill to be added to the list. To what extent do you agree? v.3

For centuries important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing, and math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills should be made as a fourth skill to be added to the list. v. 3
Over the years, many people considered learning to read, being able to write and having knowledge of solving mathematical problems as the foundations of education, however, some people believe that learning to use a computer should be added to the said list. In my opinion, I strongly agree that it would be very beneficial for all to include computer skills in the framework of our education. Firstly, this essay will discuss that with the advancement of our technology, it is inevitable that everyone should learn how to use a computer. Secondly, it will discuss the fact that almost all jobs nowadays involve the use of technology. On the one hand, computers have become a huge part of our everyday life as almost everything can be done with just one click of a button. Having skills in computing can help a student to navigate the Internet and that aids them in researching answers for their homework. Computers can replace thousands of books and this eases the burden of bringing a lot of books to school. For example, in the past, if you needed school supplies, you would go to a supermarket or a department store, but now, just by using your computer or cell phone you may opt to go shopping online in the convenience of your home, by just using apps like LAZADA and OLX. On the other hand, almost every job needs a computer in one way or another in order to complete everyday tasks. Therefore, knowing how to use a computer or tablet is a basic skill that most workplaces will require their employees to have. Computers are also used to perform groundbreaking services in some workplaces, like hospitals and private clinics. For instance, doctors use this technology so that they can perform surgeries and get accurate results. LASIX technology has helped thousands of people to bring their vision back to normal, this would be near to impossible without the use of highly advanced computer programs. In conclusion, adding computer skills in our education system is vital towards the road of advancement in technology. I strongly agree that learning skills like this will benefit not only the individual, but also the progress of any country.
Over the years,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
considered learning to read, being able to write and having knowledge of solving mathematical problems as the foundations of education,
however
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that learning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a computer should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to the said list. In my opinion, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for all to include computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in the framework of our education.
Firstly
, this essay will discuss that with the advancement of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, it is inevitable that everyone should learn how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a computer.
Secondly
, it will discuss the fact that almost all jobs nowadays involve the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of technology.

On the one hand, computers have become a huge part of our everyday life as almost everything can
be done
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one click of a button. Having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in computing can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a student to navigate the Internet and that aids them in researching answers for their homework. Computers can replace thousands of books and this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eases
the burden of bringing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
books to school.
For example
, in the past, if you needed school supplies, you would go to a supermarket or a department store,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by using your computer or cell phone you may opt to go shopping online in the convenience of your home, by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
using apps like
Possible spelling mistake found.
LAZADA
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
OLX
.

On the other hand
, almost every job needs a computer in one way or another in order to complete everyday tasks.
Therefore
, knowing how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a computer or tablet is a basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
that most workplaces will require their employees to have. Computers are
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to perform groundbreaking services in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
workplaces, like hospitals and private clinics.
For instance
, doctors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they can perform surgeries and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
accurate results.
Possible spelling mistake found.
LASIX
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
thousands of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to bring their vision back to normal, this would be near to impossible without the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
highly
advanced computer programs.

In conclusion
, adding computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in our education system is vital towards the road of advancement in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
like this will benefit not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
the individual,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the progress of any country.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay For centuries important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing, and math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills should be made as a fourth skill to be added to the list. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
367 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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